This Ship Needs More Love

OH NO

When it's October and you're in the marauders fandom....

✨ I can't do this anymore ✨

Store Worker: Would a Mr. Apollo come to the front desk?

Apollo:Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker:*points to Hermes and Dionysus*

Store Worker: I believe they are with you?

Hermes and Dionysus:We got lost.

Apollo:I didn't even bring you two with me!

listen i love that crystal meth and trauma boy have their relationship and all but i’ve been looking at the way trauma boy looks at rizz tism and it seems mighty unlikely that it’s in a heterosexual way

As someone who works with social history for a living, I feel like I’m the aggressive opposite of an anti-vaxxer

I fucking LOVE vaccines, friends. Give me the science stab. I’m so ready. it’s a beautiful day to not die of a Bajillion and one diseases that carried off like half the population before they had even reached age 10, and a significant portion before they made it to old age, 150 years ago

I go to the old cemetery. I see the vast numbers of infant and child and young adult graves. And then I go to my doctor and get injected with Potion of Fuck That Noise. This is beautiful and miraculous and I do not remotely understand how some people can reject it – not just for themselves, but for their children

decidedly unfriendly reminder that fanfiction is written by real people with real feelings for free in their free time. it's a labour of love and something to cherish. if you come across a fic that you don't enjoy, that's totally fine, but it is your due diligence as a fellow fan and decent human being to click away. leaving mean comments, absurd rating systems or harassing writers in their inbox while hiding behind an anonymous icon is not an acceptable manner to behave in any fandom and online space ever. it's disgustingly entitled, wildly disrespectful and only serves to discourage people from sharing their writing in a community that is meant to be fun and supportive. the next time you read something you don't enjoy, stop reading it and move on with your day. read something you like and leave kudos and a nice comment there instead. have some common sense and don't be a fucking asshole. it's not that fucking difficult.

Person who wants to do stuff trapped in a body that needs to lie down

Dionysus: On a scale from "Damn Daniel" to "Fre sha vaca do", how are you feeling?

Apollo: In between "It's an avocado thanks" and "How did you defeat Captain America", but as a solid answer probably "I don't need a degree to be a clothing hanger". How about you Hermes?

Hermes: Probably "Road work ahead".

Artemis: I speak many languages, and this is none of them.

You ever take an edible and go on a tangent about wanting to smack the ass of the Mothman statue in Point Pleasant, West Virginia? Yeah... me neither...

Who broke it?

*Everyone is standing around a broken coffee maker*

Ares:So? Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just want to know.

Athena:I did... I broke it.

Ares:No. No you didn't. Hermes?

Hermes:Don't look at me. Look at Artemis.

Artemis:What? I didn't break it.

Hermes: Huh. That's weird. How did you even know it was broken?

Artemis: Because it's sitting right in front of us, and it's broken!

Hermes: Suspicious.

Artemis:No it's not!

Dionysus: If it matters... Probably not...Apollo was the last one to use it.

Apollo: Liar I don't even drink that crap!

Dionysus:Oh really? What were you doing by the Coffee cart earlier?

Apollo:I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that Dionysus!

Athena:Okay, let's not fight. I broke it, let me pay for it Ares.

Ares:No! Who broke it?

Dionysus:Ares? Artemis has been awfully quiet.

Artemis:Really?

*Everyone starts arguing*

Ares being interviewed: I broke it. It burned my hand earlier, so I punched it.

Ares:I predict ten minutes from now they will be at each other's throats with warpaint and a pig head on a stick.

Ares:

Ares: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.