Latest Posts by monbeauloup - Page 3

Remus: *plucking petals off a flower* He loves me... he loves me not. He loves me... he loves me not. He loves me... *plucks last petal* he loves me not...

Sirius: *bursting in with an armful of various flowers and bouquets* That can’t be right, try again.

crying ✨

The Darkness wept || 𝓢𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓾𝓼 𝓑𝓵𝓪𝓬𝓴

Summary: Sirius spends the Christmas break at Grimmauld Place 12 and he has to learn that the lives of the ones he loves are in danger.

Warnings: hints of homophobia, physical abuse & slurs

A/N: It’s a little bit angsty, but i hope you enjoy it! Feedback is always welcome btw.

Sirius walks over to the window and reflects on his cold surroundings. He has always hated Grimmauld Place 12 with its damaged, suffocating darkness. It’s a place that encourages his tendency to feel sad and all what is waiting for him now, is the torture of the holidays. What was the point of keeping his promise to his father to stay over Christmas anyway? Sirius would have never agreed to this, but his father always leaves a terrifying impression on him. His face is filled with fury, the desire to be with James and the rest of his friends growing. He can remember them clearly. Their voices and faces never leaving his head. Suddenly, his line of thoughts are interrupted, when his mother, Walburga Black appears in the dark doorway, dressed in a beaded black evening gown. "I see you’re back," she says, in a tight-fisted tone. Sirius represses the desire to laugh. "Unfortunately," he answers.

"Don’t your so-called friends want you anymore?" A tiny, satisfied grin marks her face. "You know nothing about me or any of my friends," he shots back.

Her eyes stay fixed on him. "You haven't heard it yet, have you? I haven't told Regulus either, but i wanted to let you know first." Sirius' mouth is set in a thin line, his expression grim. "There were deadly attacks on mudbloods and half-breeds, which seem to be increasing at every minute," she says, almost satisfied, as she eyes him curiously. Sirius balls his hands into fists. "What the hell are you talking about?" He feels sick to his stomach, feeling like he might throw up. "It’s true," she declares viciously. He never felt more hate towards her than in this moment. If he could, he would wipe that condescending look off her face. "Mudbloods and bloodtraitors, filth and stains of dishonor. It had long been necessary." His head is pounding. It couldn’t be true. Remus and Lily. Whatever it takes, he would make sure, they’re safe from any hurt, harm or danger. He knows that this world is not safe for Remus. Twice he put his life in danger, to protect him and he’ll not hesitate, when the deatheaters will go to find him. He can’t afford to lose him. Sirius narrows his eyes at Walburga, but says nothing. He can feel her tense up in front of him.

"You won’t be seeing that half-breed werewolf anymore. What’s his name? Remus?"

Sirius freezes, his breathing shallow. Slowly, he turns to face his mother. "How do you know about that?" he asks harshly. Walburga looks carelessly at her nails before answering. "Regulus was always more observant and clever than you ever gave him credit for." To hell with them all, Sirius thinks. His brother and his stupid views. He adopted them so quickly. What a bunch of crap they all are. "You either stop seeing that filthy boy or he’s as good as dead." Sirius looks her right in the eyes, giving her that stare. The Black men always had a stare that made you either love then or fear them. "You wouldn’t dare," he says.

"Oh, i would," she spats. "Deep down, you've always been like the rest of us."

"I’m nothing like you. I’m what you made me!" he blares out. "If anything happens to Remus, i’ll destroy everything in this house and then myself." Sirius feels ice flood in his veins. She stares at him, wide-eyed. "Don’t tell me, you really care that much for that filth of a boy?” His fists ball at his sides, nails pressing into his palms. "He’s my friend and i love h-" he blurts out, voice trembling a little. Sirius regrets the words as soon as they leave his mouth.

"Love him!" she erupts in laughter. "Absolutely horrendous. There’s no such thing as love!" she declares in pure disgust.

His mother is furious, her rage filling the room and instinctively, Sirius takes a few steps backwards. "Pathetic," she bellows. "You brought shame on this family. Tell me... is he your boyfriend?" He’s trembling, a familiar feeling rising up inside of him, something burning in his throat.

"We’re just friends - "

Walburga clenches her jaw. The room is silent. She takes a few steps forward and fists his collar. He tries to pull away, but she doesn’t let go. "If you ever go near that boy again, if you try to talk to him, i’m going to tear you apart." Sirius goes pale, shaking. "You know i can’t do that." He’s incredulous that she’s actually threatening him. That she’s trying to break him and Remus apart. She doesn’t threaten him very often anymore, but she always has a knack for it.

Her dark and possessive eyes are fixed on him. Sirius breathes hard, chest heavy. He hated his mother all his life, the things she has put him through are unthinkable, but the unreasonable part of him still loves her, seeks her approval. She laughs, confident he won't do a damn thing. Digging her nails into his collar, she throws him up against the wall. Everything feels numb. Sirius can feel his eyes burning and his hands fly up to his head. He bites his lip to stifle a scream, as a shooting pain strikes his head.

"Sirius, don't be stupid" she says in a flat voice. "You should have known, that i’m only her to warn you."

"I hate you so much" he spits out.

"Your brother told me about the things you have going on with that boy. You’re gonna leave him alone. I don’t want any mudblood close to you." He chuckles, loudly. "No, i’m not." His mother looks him in the eye, "I wasn't asking, Sirius."

"I'm not gonna leave him alone, that's final."

"Clearly you are having trouble understanding me. You are not to speak or be with him ever again. If i know you’ve been in contact with him, or anyone else of your so-called friends, i’ll take care of it and they’ll all be dead, you ungrateful brat."

He never felt so weak and powerless before. And the whole time, his mind keeps wandering back to Remus. "Get the fuck out. Get the fuck out, now!" she yells. Grabbing his arms, pulling him harshly and watching him struggle to get up. Sirius’ ears are ringing. "Mother." He suddenly hears the all too familiar voice of his brother. "Let him go, you'll hurt him." Regulus attempts to pull him away, but Sirius shoves him away. "Don’t you dare touch me", he growls. There are tears forming in his eyes, desperately holding back the urge to cry, as he stumbles away. Looking at his mother with terror in his eyes, he leaves the room and slams the door.

Nothing in the world could calm Sirius's nerves tonight.

"I know someday you'll have a beautiful life

I know you'll be a star

In somebody else's sky

But why

Why

Why can't it be

Oh can't it be mine?"

I was listening to Pearl Jam again and...

JKR really wrote Wolfstar to be so incredibly gay and then she’s like “Nope they were not in love they’re just besties 😁” Mmmhm okay yeaahh suuureee. She even wrote Harry noticing Remus stare at Sirius and he didn’t even notice himself staring at men most of the time. He was THAT obvious, but as we all know this woman is absolutely terrible anyways. People’s existence and acceptance is not up for debate. Terfs suck.

I’m once again thinking about Sirius, Remus and their epic 39 line stare.

you’re so pretty!

aww tysm :(

WALBURGA and SIRIUS

After one of their fights, she used crucio on him and he broke apart because he couldn’t handle the violence anymore. He packed his stuff, left and went to live with James Potter and his parents.

richard siken quotes that are so sirius black

Maybe I’ll do like close up portraits of all of them

can you turn the prompt 'he studies his scars in the mirror' into a wolfstar one shot? if you feel like taking prompts at some stage xxx

hi! yeah of course! i’m more than willing to do that. <3

so, for now i have this rule where i only write brief one shots with 600-1k words. it's short but sweet, i suppose. i hope you like it.

Warnings:

light angst, mentions of scars

~*~

The Star’s Soul ||  𝖂𝖔𝖑𝖋𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖗

Remus has never liked his scars. They make him feel on edge. A constant reminder of his imprisonment. His torture. Sometimes the only thing he wants is to kill the creature that lurks inside of him.

He studies his scars in the mirror. His fragile body pale and nimble. Trembling all over. He can’t remember it all, but last night’s full moon was rough. He distantly recalls the feeling of his bruised, cut feet and Sirius' warm figure carrying his nude body along the woods.

"My beautiful Moony." Remus flinches at the choice of words, as he takes a moment to admire Sirius’ reflection appearing in the mirror. The nickname always reminds him of the unbearable pain, he so desperately wishes he could forget. Sirius’ gaze lingers over his bare arms and chest, pupils dilating and flickering over the scars. It lefts him feeling self conscious and a tiny part at the back of his head demands to move his body out of sight, but his body refuses to obey to his frantic thoughts.

"You're marvelous to my eyes," Sirius whispers, cloud like voice, softly wrapping around Remus’ senses. He lowers his eyes, his fingers running gently over one of his most recent scars, which hasn’t quite healed yet. Remus hasn’t said anything yet, but his chest feels too heavy and he holds onto his heart, instead of giving it to Sirius.

"I know what you’re thinking about. It’s alright, Remus. There’s nothing wrong about you." He can’t find it in him to fill the space with words. It’s not like he could, even if he wanted to. Remus takes a deep breath and slowly spins around to face his love. He stares into Sirius' dark eyes and exhales long and slow, nodding.

The level of intimacy they share in their glances is mesmerizing. Sirius is speaking with his eyes to express his love. Nothing is left unsaid. He brushes Remus’ cheek with his thumb and reaches for bandages, placing them on each of his scars carefully. With a little frown, causing a crease between his brows, he places a kiss beside one of the bandages.

Remus’ whole body reacts to it alongside a small, shaky sigh lost in his breath. Letting his gaze wander, Sirius places a few more kisses and lifts his gaze with a questioning look. "Does it feel better?"

"Yes..." Remus says quietly, almost like a whisper. He smiles slightly. A small but genuine smile. He lifts his hand to tuck a strand of hair behind Sirius’ ear and then his thumb strokes his temple, while his remaining fingers gently ease into his hair. “Why is it always you who can make me feel these things?” he asks, voice heavy.

Sirius instinctively leans into his touch with a tiny grin on his face. Remus’ heart flutters slightly at how close there are now. “I could ask you the same question,” he replies softly and lets out a small, shaky breath as well, his hand threading into Remus’ hair and running through it gently.

He never experiences love, safety and happiness as much as he does with Sirius. How could he worry about his scars, when he has the biggest blessing of his life right in front of him? And when Sirius kisses him, the whole world dials down to just their little bubble, where it’s just safety, warmth and love.

"I love you," Sirius says, the words slipping past his lips like a prayer, whispered into the space between their mouths. A tiny whimper escaping Remus as Sirius kisses him again. Again and again.

It’s as though they’re minted love itself. His heart slams against his lungs as Sirius’ eyes penetrate his soul. He touches him like he’s the most beautiful creature he ever laid eyes on. Remus has never been more in love. Never known a soul like his. Sirius is what his soul knows and they’ll always meet for a love, that has never been more certain.

Sirius is the one

who heals him -

who makes his scars

feel beautiful.

𝓢𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓾𝓼 𝓑𝓵𝓪𝓬𝓴

➳ "If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals"

༻❀. About me .❀༺

Hello, so good to see you here! ♡

Welcome to my blog.

This is my navigation post - feel free to come back to it at all times.

My writing:

𝖂𝖔𝖑𝖋𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖗

The Act of Love

The Star’s Soul

Where all the Poets go to die

𝕾𝖎𝖗𝖎𝖚𝖘 𝕭𝖑𝖆𝖈𝖐

The Darkness wept

𝕳𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

Remus Lupin

Sirius Black

𝕾𝖍𝖎𝖕𝖘

one

two

three

Please know, that i’ll write for the Marauders era only and writing requests are solely for that.

❉───────•~❉•᯽•❉~•───────❉

My requests are open for:

headcanons

brief oneshots (600-1k words)

drabbles

ships

For ship requests you can give me as much information as you like, but this is what i'll need, if you would like a ship:

a detailed description of your personality (hobby’s, interests, character traits etc.)

preferred gender for the character (if you have a preference)

personality type (your MBTI would be very helpful, but only if you know it)

sun sign (others signs optional)

what do you look like? describe your physical appearance (hair colour, hair style etc.)

If you’re unsure about something you’d like to request, you’re more than welcome to message me or send me an ask.

My Love

Sirius Black called everyone love, it was just his thing.

No one was certain how or when it had started, but by the end of fourth year, it had become his thing.

When Peter would suggest a prank,

"We should hide dungbombs in the Slytherin common room—"

"Love, this isn't second year."

When Marlene would ask for advice,

"I just don't know why she's upset with me!"

"Have you even asked Dorcas?"

"...Well, no—"

"Marlene!"

"I thought you could ask her!"

"Love, I'm not a mind reader, ask her yourself!"

When he would plan parties with James,

"Don't ya think this is enough alcohol for one party, Pads?"

"Do you know who you're planning this party for? Gryffindors can drink, love."

When he would study with Lily,

"How do you get this so easy?"

"It's a natural gift, love—okay, fine, I looked at Remus' paper."

But there was one person Sirius found felt unnatural calling love, and that was Remus Lupin.

It wasn't that Remus would make a face, or squirm, or had ever said anything about it, but Sirius found it odd to say around the boy.

Perhaps it was the odd feeling he got around his friend, or the weird feeling he got when the word rolled off his tongue when he called Remus, love, but whatever it was, Sirius found himself getting flustered by saying the word.

He quickly realized why when Remus had ever said it one day to Sirius.

They had been studying for OWLs in the library when without looking up, Remus casually said,

"Can you pass that book, love?"

Sirius' head shot up and he felt his heart race as he fumbled with the book in his hand.

It was just a four letter word that he said to everyone, why was he so flustered when Remus said it back?

The more he thought about it, the more he realized his true feelings for the particular boy.

When he would say call everyone else love, sure he loved them—of course he loved his friends—but with Remus, it was because he was in love with him.

The more time he had spent analyzing his friendship with Remus, the more Sirius realized there were obvious signs that Remus felt the same way.

Remus would smile whenever he saw his friends in the hospital wing after a full moon, but he would smile the biggest once he saw Sirius.

When Sirius would be explaining something, Remus would stare at Sirius, carefully watching every way Sirius moved his hands in the air as though it helped him comprehend whatever Sirius was saying.

Remus would happily help Sirius whenever he needed it, even if he had already ranted about how much work he had.

Remus would loudly cheer Sirius on at each quidditch game and even the practices despite showing zero interest in the sport before.

Remus would smile and blush whenever Sirius would pass a note in transfiguration or whatever other class they sat beside each other in.

He would share almost everything of his with Sirius, even his secret chocolate stash.

It was all small things that Remus would do and once Sirius had finally picked up on them, he grinned at the thought of how he would subtly tell Remus he knew.

The idea was small and at first, Sirius wasn't certain if it had worked, but after three days, he knew it had when Remus pulled him aside on their way to charms.

"What's going on?"

"What are you talking about?"

Remus furrowed his brows.

"Sirius, c'mon. I know I'm not imagining it."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, my love."

Remus' eyes widened as he pointed at Sirius with his finger.

"There it is! You just said it!"

Sirius smirked and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Why do you keep saying that?" Remus continued.

Sirius shrugged, "Because I can."

"You're referring to me as 'my love' because you can?" Remus slowly said, the faintest blush forming on his cheeks.

Sirius shrugged again and tried to act as though none of this bothered him when in reality, his heart was pounding from his chest. "And because I love you."

Sirius watched as the blush on Remus' face darkened until his entire face was crimson.

"S'what are you gonna do about it?" Sirius boldly asked above the ringing in his ears.

There was a smirk on Remus' face as he ever so slightly shook his head.

In one motion, Remus brought his bag from his shoulder to the floor, swiftly cupped Sirius' face, and brought their lips together.

From then on, Sirius had an actual reason to refer to Remus as my love, and naturally, he said it whenever he could.

It continued even after they had finished Hogwarts and for years, it was the only way he would refer to Remus.

It was his thing and it became useful and not just endearing in the midst of the war.

On the night of October 31st, 1981, Sirius was on their doorstep, banging on the door with a bundle of blankets in his arms.

When Remus finally opened the door, his eyes widened.

"Sirius—"

"Remus, I-I can explain—What are you doing?" He cut himself off as Remus had backed further into their flat and almost shut the door.

"You called me by my name. You haven't called me that—"

"Since the end of fifth year when I told you I loved you, now will you please let me in, my love?" Sirius rushed.

In one night, they had not only lost their best friends, but they became parents to their Godson.

As the years passed, the only way Sirius would address Remus would be with those two words.

My love.

And if it wasn’t my love, then it was darling, sweetheart, Moons, but it was almost always my love.

After a particular bad moon, Remus was confined to their bed while Sirius did his best to keep Harry away from Uncle Moony, but that was easier said than done when raising a five year old.

Eventually, Sirius gave up in trying to keep Harry away from Remus when the boy ever suggested cuddles in bed. It wasn’t as though Sirius could refuse cuddling, especially if it was with his two favorite people in the world.

He sighed and Harry reached for his hand and dragged his Uncle Padfoot to the closed bedroom door.

Sirius quickly pulled Harry to his hip as he fumbled with the child lock on the door and as soon as the door opened to reveal a bandaged up Remus, Harry squirmed in Sirius’ arms.

His heart had seemed to swell as he watched Harry run to the bed and bring himself under the covers, curling up to Remus’ side with a concerned look on his face. He followed the boy and climbed in the bed, leaving Harry in the middle, and slowly brought his hand through Remus’ curls.

He watched as Remus had begun to wake, his brown eyes slowly opening and he tried to force a smile once he saw Sirius looking down at him.

“‘m sorry, my love, but someone insisted on cuddling Uncle Moony.” Sirius whispered as Harry carefully snuggled up into Remus’ chest.

Remus smiled and gently kissed the top of Harry’s head.

“Are you okay?” Harry quietly asked, the words mumbled against Remus’ chest.

“I will be. With you and Uncle Padfoot, I’ll be better before you know it.” Remus softly assured, his voice still raspy. His eyes began to droop as he slowly pulled an arm around Harry.

“Cuddles can make anything better, my love.” The small voice said and suddenly both of the adults were wide eyed.

“Harry, what did you just call Uncle Moony?” Sirius softly asked.

Harry pulled himself away from Remus’ chest and turned to look up at his godfathers.

“His name.” He simply said then turned to directly address Remus. “I mean that is what Uncle Padfoot calls you, right?”

Remus immediately turned his head to Sirius, both of their eyes filling with tears.

They both kissed the top of Harry’s head and if the boy was confused, he didn’t mention it—though random head kisses were normal in the Black-Lupin-Potter household.

When they pulled away, their tear filled eyes met again as Sirius quickly reached over Harry and gently cupped his partner’s face before softly bringing their lips together.

“Don’t ever stop saying it.” Remus whispered against Sirius’ lips.

“For you, my love, of course.” Sirius whispered as he pulled away with a smile on his lips and happy tears streaming down his cheeks.

        She had a way of seeing the beauty in others, even, and perhaps most especially, when that person couldn’t see it in themselves.

                                                                 - Remus Lupin

More shitty wolfstar cuddles because i need the seretonin

remus lupin fucking loved dead poets society. he was obsessed. he loved watching it. he even bought the book and devoured it in an hour and a half. he loved it.

he cried over it, alone, for almost two weeks. something would remind him of it or he would think of neil and todd and he would have to excuse himself, tears welling.

sirius was the one who figured out something was wrong. he demanded to know who exactly was hurting remus so badly that he was arriving to breakfast with tear stained cheeks. he was so noble as he half yelled his demand at remus, who looked so broken over something unbeknownst to sirius.

so remus told him. he said it was silly and ridiculous but he was hung up on this film. and this book. and these fictional characters. he didn’t say that he saw neil and todd in the same way he saw him and sirius. he didn’t say he was letting his mind wander to places where he lost sirius like todd lost neil. he didn’t say any of that. he said he was silly for being hung up and he’d be over it by next week.

but sirius demanded to watch it with him. he suggested they watch it when everyone else went to hogsmeade. he claimed it would be more fun to see a film that was that important to remus in this way.

so they sat together and watched it. and sirius laughed at parts and made comments about how similar their little group was to the poets. and he smiled along with neil and todd as they laughed in their dorm.

by the time the movie ended, they were both crying. remus was embarrassed by his blubbering but his thoughts were cut short by sirius landing his hand on his thigh. “you can never leave me like that.”

and they both stared at each other. they were both thinking the same thing, eyes locked. they understood one another. they understood todd and neils relationship because it was just like their relationship. a relationship full of love.

they shared their first kiss that day. and then they sat on the couch in the common room, wrapped up in each other, reading the copy of the book which remus had bought. and they held each other, as if one of them would slip away. they could never let each other go.

i dont want to think critically i just want to read about sirius and remus finding each other after azkaban....relearning all the things they’d forgotten about each other....first kiss after 13 years.....first “i love you” since they were 21.....remembering all the little quirks and habits they’d built together.....

reblog if you’re a safe place for:

lesbian

gay

bisexual

transgender

queer

pansexual

demisexual

ace

hopeless romantics

cis-men

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the whole spectrum etc…

follow everyone who reblogs ;)

start here, caitlyn siehl // untitled, fortesa latifi // rien ne va plus, margarita karapanau (trans. karen emmerich) // black iris, leah raeder // the thorn merchant, yusuf komunyakaa // monster movie, nicola maye goldberg // a key to common lethal fungi, marge piercy // give me a god i can relate to, blythe baird // crimson peak, dir. guillermo del torro (2014) // the house of hades, rick riordan.

Sirius: May i sit here?

Remus: That’s my lap.

Sirius: That doesn’t answer my question, Remus.

When Regulus gets Sorted into Slytherin and officially ripped away from his older brother, Sirius takes the loss hard, not quite used to the radio silence or seeing his brother on the opposite side of the battlefield. He misses talking to his little brother, so he hatches a brilliant idea. He marches up to Regulus one afternoon, face contorted in anger, and yells, comment allez vous? Tu me manques! Regulus’ eyebrows furrow in confusion as Sirius stares at him, waiting for an answer, and then he understands. Je vais bien. Tu me manques aussi! Their loud voices draw a crowd, students only too excited to see the Black Brothers fighting, unaware that they’re really just confessing how much they miss each other. It’s a clever code that allows them to speak on occasion, just enough for Sirius to know that his little brother still loves him, that he hasn’t lost him quite yet.

@wizardingworldonline​ event 03 | side characters

“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”

ugh my heart

Parallels

Me: :(

*Ben Barnes talking on instagram live about being the fancast of Sirius Black*

Me: :')

Remus and Sirius and their friends in their small apartment after some drinks.

Prisoner of Azkaban is my comfort book, but i can’t stand JK Rowling so i simply headcanon that Remus and Sirius dated during school and never fell out of love.

Moony and Padfoot

Remus reading muggle books to Sirius is the headcanon I’m here for

Whenever Remus felt self-conscious about his scars, Sirius took his face between his hands and lightly kissed each one. as he did so, he whispered, “I love every single scar. I love you, i’m here and i’m not going anywhere.”