My Love

My Love

Sirius Black called everyone love, it was just his thing.

No one was certain how or when it had started, but by the end of fourth year, it had become his thing.

When Peter would suggest a prank,

"We should hide dungbombs in the Slytherin common room—"

"Love, this isn't second year."

When Marlene would ask for advice,

"I just don't know why she's upset with me!"

"Have you even asked Dorcas?"

"...Well, no—"

"Marlene!"

"I thought you could ask her!"

"Love, I'm not a mind reader, ask her yourself!"

When he would plan parties with James,

"Don't ya think this is enough alcohol for one party, Pads?"

"Do you know who you're planning this party for? Gryffindors can drink, love."

When he would study with Lily,

"How do you get this so easy?"

"It's a natural gift, love—okay, fine, I looked at Remus' paper."

But there was one person Sirius found felt unnatural calling love, and that was Remus Lupin.

It wasn't that Remus would make a face, or squirm, or had ever said anything about it, but Sirius found it odd to say around the boy.

Perhaps it was the odd feeling he got around his friend, or the weird feeling he got when the word rolled off his tongue when he called Remus, love, but whatever it was, Sirius found himself getting flustered by saying the word.

He quickly realized why when Remus had ever said it one day to Sirius.

They had been studying for OWLs in the library when without looking up, Remus casually said,

"Can you pass that book, love?"

Sirius' head shot up and he felt his heart race as he fumbled with the book in his hand.

It was just a four letter word that he said to everyone, why was he so flustered when Remus said it back?

The more he thought about it, the more he realized his true feelings for the particular boy.

When he would say call everyone else love, sure he loved them—of course he loved his friends—but with Remus, it was because he was in love with him.

The more time he had spent analyzing his friendship with Remus, the more Sirius realized there were obvious signs that Remus felt the same way.

Remus would smile whenever he saw his friends in the hospital wing after a full moon, but he would smile the biggest once he saw Sirius.

When Sirius would be explaining something, Remus would stare at Sirius, carefully watching every way Sirius moved his hands in the air as though it helped him comprehend whatever Sirius was saying.

Remus would happily help Sirius whenever he needed it, even if he had already ranted about how much work he had.

Remus would loudly cheer Sirius on at each quidditch game and even the practices despite showing zero interest in the sport before.

Remus would smile and blush whenever Sirius would pass a note in transfiguration or whatever other class they sat beside each other in.

He would share almost everything of his with Sirius, even his secret chocolate stash.

It was all small things that Remus would do and once Sirius had finally picked up on them, he grinned at the thought of how he would subtly tell Remus he knew.

The idea was small and at first, Sirius wasn't certain if it had worked, but after three days, he knew it had when Remus pulled him aside on their way to charms.

"What's going on?"

"What are you talking about?"

Remus furrowed his brows.

"Sirius, c'mon. I know I'm not imagining it."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, my love."

Remus' eyes widened as he pointed at Sirius with his finger.

"There it is! You just said it!"

Sirius smirked and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Why do you keep saying that?" Remus continued.

Sirius shrugged, "Because I can."

"You're referring to me as 'my love' because you can?" Remus slowly said, the faintest blush forming on his cheeks.

Sirius shrugged again and tried to act as though none of this bothered him when in reality, his heart was pounding from his chest. "And because I love you."

Sirius watched as the blush on Remus' face darkened until his entire face was crimson.

"S'what are you gonna do about it?" Sirius boldly asked above the ringing in his ears.

There was a smirk on Remus' face as he ever so slightly shook his head.

In one motion, Remus brought his bag from his shoulder to the floor, swiftly cupped Sirius' face, and brought their lips together.

From then on, Sirius had an actual reason to refer to Remus as my love, and naturally, he said it whenever he could.

It continued even after they had finished Hogwarts and for years, it was the only way he would refer to Remus.

It was his thing and it became useful and not just endearing in the midst of the war.

On the night of October 31st, 1981, Sirius was on their doorstep, banging on the door with a bundle of blankets in his arms.

When Remus finally opened the door, his eyes widened.

"Sirius—"

"Remus, I-I can explain—What are you doing?" He cut himself off as Remus had backed further into their flat and almost shut the door.

"You called me by my name. You haven't called me that—"

"Since the end of fifth year when I told you I loved you, now will you please let me in, my love?" Sirius rushed.

In one night, they had not only lost their best friends, but they became parents to their Godson.

As the years passed, the only way Sirius would address Remus would be with those two words.

My love.

And if it wasn’t my love, then it was darling, sweetheart, Moons, but it was almost always my love.

After a particular bad moon, Remus was confined to their bed while Sirius did his best to keep Harry away from Uncle Moony, but that was easier said than done when raising a five year old.

Eventually, Sirius gave up in trying to keep Harry away from Remus when the boy ever suggested cuddles in bed. It wasn’t as though Sirius could refuse cuddling, especially if it was with his two favorite people in the world.

He sighed and Harry reached for his hand and dragged his Uncle Padfoot to the closed bedroom door.

Sirius quickly pulled Harry to his hip as he fumbled with the child lock on the door and as soon as the door opened to reveal a bandaged up Remus, Harry squirmed in Sirius’ arms.

His heart had seemed to swell as he watched Harry run to the bed and bring himself under the covers, curling up to Remus’ side with a concerned look on his face. He followed the boy and climbed in the bed, leaving Harry in the middle, and slowly brought his hand through Remus’ curls.

He watched as Remus had begun to wake, his brown eyes slowly opening and he tried to force a smile once he saw Sirius looking down at him.

“‘m sorry, my love, but someone insisted on cuddling Uncle Moony.” Sirius whispered as Harry carefully snuggled up into Remus’ chest.

Remus smiled and gently kissed the top of Harry’s head.

“Are you okay?” Harry quietly asked, the words mumbled against Remus’ chest.

“I will be. With you and Uncle Padfoot, I’ll be better before you know it.” Remus softly assured, his voice still raspy. His eyes began to droop as he slowly pulled an arm around Harry.

“Cuddles can make anything better, my love.” The small voice said and suddenly both of the adults were wide eyed.

“Harry, what did you just call Uncle Moony?” Sirius softly asked.

Harry pulled himself away from Remus’ chest and turned to look up at his godfathers.

“His name.” He simply said then turned to directly address Remus. “I mean that is what Uncle Padfoot calls you, right?”

Remus immediately turned his head to Sirius, both of their eyes filling with tears.

They both kissed the top of Harry’s head and if the boy was confused, he didn’t mention it—though random head kisses were normal in the Black-Lupin-Potter household.

When they pulled away, their tear filled eyes met again as Sirius quickly reached over Harry and gently cupped his partner’s face before softly bringing their lips together.

“Don’t ever stop saying it.” Remus whispered against Sirius’ lips.

“For you, my love, of course.” Sirius whispered as he pulled away with a smile on his lips and happy tears streaming down his cheeks.

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“some people think sirius loved remus despite his lycanthropy. wrong. sirius loved remus WITH his lycanthropy. he accepted and loved this side of Remus with everything he had. sirius loved remus, lycanthropy and all.”

i like fully want to agree with this, like wholeheartedly wish I could- but if he did love remus with lycanthropy he wouldn’t have used it as a excuse to stop trusting him

Same with James and lily, sure they never believed Remus was the spy but they still didn’t tell him they were switching the secret keeper, so there must’ve been some doubt in their mind/ mistrust (and let’s face it, it was because of his lycanthropy- nothing else) that Remus was in fact the spy because as a werewolves he had a “motive”

SIDE NOTE: I bet you if peter was also a werewolf (hypothetically speaking) I bet you they wouldn’t have trusted him either in that time

that’s fair! my fan interpretation was clouding my judgment a little bit. nevertheless, i still think only sirius didn't trust remus enough to tell him that they changed the secret keeper. isn’t that what’s given in canon? and even if he trusted remus fully, peter would’ve been the more tactical choice bc remus was in "danger” all the time and wouldn’t be able to keep it safe. peter was less of a target. i’m confused tbh, but tell me if i’m wrong pls. :) it’s been a while since i read the books, but i don’t ever recall reading that james and lily mistrusted remus or suspected him. i don’t think they would’ve ever done that. sirius mistrusted him at some point and james was definitely aware of that, but i'm sure he never ever bought that. in the end he agreed not to tell remus, but i think not bc he believed what sirius said, but bc he loved him and he deluded himself thinking that not telling remus would be a way to keep him safe. mistrusting remus was one of sirius' biggest regrets, but i don’t think it was only bc of his lycanthropy. he suspected remus as the spy bc he was distant and more of a "loner", not necessarily bc he was a werewolf, but that’s just my personal opinion you know. maybe i’m wrong. i know in the prisoner of azkaban they both said sorry to each other bc they thought of each other as the spy. tbh i also think making peter the secret keeper wasn't necessarily a choice of trust. they made him the keeper bc no one would’ve suspected him to be the keeper. it was a trick. ngl this is actually a topic worth of discussion haha. thanks for sharing your point of view with me and if you like, you can write me your opinion on what i just wrote. would love to hear your thoughts and also the thoughts of others.

~*~

if you’re reading this rn, pls feel free to share/send me your opinion on this topic!! 🖤✨


Tags
4 years ago

Hi! I love your blog, but can I get a marauder ship? :< I'm 5'3, Ravenclaw, has a medium brown wavy hair, dark brown eyes, I'm shy at first but has a loud and playful energy, loves to be around my friends most of the time, always reading, writing, sometimes like to jam in my room like dancing while music is on full volume, sometimes makes art but I also love designing, likes to be alone but not really at the same time? Likes being out in the nature, adventurous, a secretive person and I almost forgot my pronouns is she/her.

hi! first of all, thank you so much!! i really appreciate it. ☺️✨

i ship you with sirius black!

Hi! I Love Your Blog, But Can I Get A Marauder Ship? :< I'm 5'3, Ravenclaw, Has A Medium Brown Wavy Hair,

there’s fascination on both sides, right from the beginning.

your energy matches each others. it's like you've known each other for years.

he loves that you’re adventurous and open to go on midnight escapades with the other boys.

when you two are together, everything feels electric and contagious.

he invites you into the gryffindor common room quite a lot and you like to spent time by listening to music together.

you discuss and show him lots of muggle books and music and he loves it.

a few days later he proudly shows up with his new favorite band t-shirt. (a band you showed him.)

from then on, the bond between you just grows closer and closer.

you’re the definition of 'friends to lovers slow-burn'.

the pining is astronomical. everyone is like “i need these two to get their shit together and kiss already.”

you’re the more reserved and "shy” one though and he knows that he has to make the first move.

so he decides to ask you out on a date to the three broomsticks.

you both drink butterbeers, as you two would talk about the last quidditch game and he would make fun about how gryffindor kicked ravenclaw's ass and you would laugh and find yourself smiling throughout the whole date.

towards the end he shows you the start of the design of the marauders map and asks for your opinion on it.

you’re incredibly moved by this huge act of trust and stare at him in wonder.

"i do trust you, you're one of the only people i've trusted since this whole thing started."

the rest is a slow realization by you both that that what you two have is something bigger and deeper than you could have ever imagined.

⊱ ──── ˗ˏˋ✧*♡*✧´ˎ˗ ────⊰

i hope SO much that you'll like it. thank you for being my mutual. ✨💫

lots of love!!


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4 years ago
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Remus: * Sirius Black. Sirius Black. Sirius Black. Sirius Black. Sirius Black. Sirius Black. Sirius Black. Sirius Black *

James: Remus?

Remus: nothing

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monbeauloup - our tragedy was written in the stars
our tragedy was written in the stars

𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞, 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐚 | 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐬𝐡𝐞/𝐡𝐞𝐫 | 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐩 | 𝐰𝐨𝐥𝐟𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 | 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐞𝐫𝐚 | 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 | 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐚𝐜𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐚𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐲 ☽

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