No One Looks At My Blog So It Doesn't Matter What I Post - Blog Posts

When I was 14, I heard my dad talking to one of his friends. My dad’s friend was expecting their first child and found out it was going to be a boy. They wanted a girl. My dad told his friend that he and my mom wanted 2 kids, a girl and a boy. Their first child was a boy, my older brother. My dad said, looking back, he was so happy they had a boy first.

When I was born, he said they really wanted a daughter. So they decided to have a third child.

I learned at that point, I was never wanted.

There is no question that my sister is my dad’s favorite. Then my brother. Then me.

There is no question that my brother is my mom’s favorite. My sister is a close second. Most the time, I don’t even think she likes me.

Life has taught me that I am just a disposable cup.

Like this cup, I don’t have any value, once someone is done with what they want from me, I get discarded. When people are done with my friendship, or tired of my affection, or don’t need my help anymore, I get left behind. I am sometimes left on the table, or forgotten, or tossed in the trash. But all too often, I end up crushed along the side the road.

When I was in 2nd grade, my best friend had a sleepover for his friends. I wasn’t invited. I wasn’t popular enough, or good enough in sports, or cool enough. We had been best friends for 6 years, we grew up together. Then I was tossed aside. For the longest time, it hurt really bad. Now, it’s just a reminder of how little I’m worth.

Life has taught me that I am just a disposable cup.

Like this cup, I don’t have any value, once someone is done with what they want from me, I get discarded. When people are done with my friendship, or tired of my affection, or don’t need my help anymore, I get left behind. I am sometimes left on the table, or forgotten, or tossed in the trash. But all too often, I end up crushed along the side the road.