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House Vines

Gryfindor: What did you get in your happy meal?

Hufflepuff: Chapstick, what’d you get?

Gryfindor: A new SKATEBOARD!

Hufflepuff: Wha-

Gryfindor: *while skating away* LATER PUSSY!


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House Vines

Slytherin: I should’ve left you on that street corner where you were standing.

Gryfindor: *intense pause*

Gryfindor: But ch’ya didnt!


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House Vines

Slytherin: *holding a crayon*

Hufflepuff: SLYTHERIN! Is THat A WeED!?

Slytherin: No, this is a crayon-

Hufflepuff: IM CalLiNg ThE POliCe!! *dials 911 in a microwave*

Slytherin: *rolls eyes*

911: 911 what’s your emergency?

X files theme


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House Vines

*eerie violin music playing*

Slytherin: Hello Gryffindor.

Gryffindor: Hi Slytherin.

Slytherin: *looks down*

Slytherin: Those shoes look familiar. *smiles coldly*


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House Vines

Ravenclaw: *staring at Gryffindor*

Gryffindor: *looks at Ravenclaw*

Ravenclaw:

Gryffindor:

Gryffindor: THE HELL YOU STARING AT!?

Ravenclaw: The spider.

Gryffindor: The spider?-*Notices spider a their head* OH GOD!

Ravenclaw: Damn.


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House Vines

Gryffindors mother: Well Professor Mcgonagall, my daughter would not do something such a thing therefore after.

Gryffindor mother: *whispering harshly to Gryffindor* Gryffindor did you fucking do that thing therefore after?


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