REBLOG IF YOU'RE A HUMAN AND YOU USE EM DASH

BEST QUOTES From the Dream SMP - Techno Edition

"I don't believe in friendship, Tommy… We tell ourselves it's real so the cogs of society can turn… The only thing that's real, Tommy… is CASH!" (to Tommy)

"I had to take a break from drowning to get a glass of water-"

"The thing is, Tommy, you're using words, but the thing about this world, Tommy, is that the only universal language is violence. We've had that conversation before, and we spoke that language in the pit. It's over Tommy. On to a new day." (to Tommy)

"NOT EVEN CLOSE, BABY! TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES!"

"Technoblade sometimes dies."

"I have a pickaxe, Quackity, and I'll *put it through your teeth*!" (to Quackity)

"HEEEEEH?" (to Butcher Army)

"There's voices... Sometimes the voices say... E." (chat)

"Welcome home, Theseus!" (to Tommy)

"Do you want to be a hero Tommy? You want to be a hero Tommy? The *die like one*!" (to Tommy)

"The thing about this world Tommy, is that good things don't happen to heroes." (to Tommy)

“Man, you’ve gotta raise your standards.” (to Dream)

i need a better title

For countries where suicide is illegal (North Korea, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, etc. etc.) how do they enforce it? Like send a corpse to jail? This is hilarious imo

A lil C!WilburSoot moodboard for y'all

I made this in a rush, don't judge me

"i don't like the new pope"

yeah, same, I think nearly everyone from since the renaissance would agree with you

Martin Luther (german guy, not mlk) literally said "fuck the church" it's these types of challenges literally why people made the more protestant, orthodox, etc. etc.

not an anthropologist nor a religious expert, but i think we can all be sure about one thing: humans literally never change.

Ran. It's at 13.8k notes.

hi tumblr im back (thank u to oomf for putting me on this)

i think i got the major ones

Don't have Spotify wrapped, but here is what C!ranboo would probably like: https://open.spotify.com/track/3miloWzBao7srOc0W2YRJj?si=d4ddc97f92f047d5

Spotify wrapped is here. Reblog with the song you believe would be your Blorbo’s #1 most listened song this year

idk what to say 'bout this

I have 3 cats and can confirm

Raised to be a child soilder, but hes just so weak

He cant do anything right, can he? Too weak for battle, too dumb for planning, well its not like he ever had a proper education

He's 9, hes a grown up basically, yet he doesnt know how to write, how to hold a sword, his clothes are too big on him, does he even eat enough?