Latest Posts by existentialism-and-chocolate - Page 4

as a professionally annoyed person I confirm I grow into an eldritch monstrosity and vomit rays of lava when I want someone to leave me alone.

page 51 of “Heroes of the dawn” (1914)

true love is what you felt for that album you played for one month straight

Sorry for being resigned to my fate and being doomed by the narrative, it will happen again

what the fuck is going on this year. january through june didnt happen. july is a distant memory. august and september were the longest months of my life. october ended in 5 seconds. why is november here already this isn’t right

dies right with you

oaughaoyagggh exams next week… dies

Fhh spoilers? Idk

Phoebe really said "fight or flight I'd rather lie than tell you I'm in love with you."

*calling God*: yeah hello there. Yeah so I saw a mosquito today. Yeah it's November. Yeah in the northern hemisphere. Please explain.

hoodies are one of the most powerful and underappreciated articles of clothing. cold? put on a hoodie. raining? put on a hoodie. no bra? put on a hoodie. nothing to wear? hoodie. cripplingly low self esteem? you already know. so versatile! so multifaceted!

Happy halloween (belated) and happy all saints day to those who celebrate, respectively!!

Teachers be like "I don't wanna give you guys homework over the break lol :)" and then give you a test with, like, 10 topics to study for over the break

Some more Secret Shanghai incorrect quotes! (Some of these take place in a past timeline)

Katherina: Who the fuck broke the toaster? Phoebe: It was Marshall. Alisa: It was Marshall. Benedikt: Marshall broke it. Marshall: Marshall: ...yOU PROMISED-

Katherina: Mom, can I please borrow five dollars? Juliette: If you’re only borrowing it, does that mean you’ll pay me back at some point? Katherina: Of course. Katherina: Not directly, but with my love. Juliette: So that’s a no.

Orion: Hey, Rosalind, do you have feelings for me? Rosalind: Yeah, anger.

Alisa, about Oliver: I could fix him, but honestly whatever the hell is wrong with him is way funnier. Rosalind: That's what any god probably thinks about me.

Bendikt: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized. Marshall: *steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to his knees and sob while apologizing profusely* Benedikt: That one. I want that one.

Silas: Not to be nsfw but I want someone to hold me while I sleep.

Rosalind: I lost Phoebe. Alisa: How did you LOSE Phoebe?! Rosalind: To be fair, she is very small.

Phoebe: How are you today? Silas: Please don’t make me think about my life.

Juliette: You either buckle down and do your work or you’ll end up at McDonalds. Katherina: We're going to McDonalds if I don't do my work? Juliette: NO-

Silas: Why can’t we all just get along? 

Orion: Because most of us are assholes, Silas.

Rosalind: I hate you. Orion: Well, according to this picture I drew of us holding hands, that is untrue.

Silas: Are you really planning to shoot the demon? Phoebe: Don't worry, it's a holy gun. Silas: How so? Phoebe: It makes holes.

Marshall: Operation no more distractions is a go! *not even 10 seconds later* Marshall: Oh, look! A butterfly!

Alisa: *on the phone with Celia* I can’t talk right now, I’m doing hot girl shit. Celia: You’re pulling Oreos apart and saving off the frosting to make a mega Oreo, aren’t you. Alisa: Maybe.

Rosalind: What kinds of sounds annoy you? Orion: Are we talking real sounds or imaginary ones? Rosalind, now interested: Lets say imaginary. Orion: Spiders wearing flip flops.

Roma & Juliette: Do not come over to my house. If the house is on fire you may knock once, if I don’t answer assume I set the fire and I want to burn to death.

Orion, excitedly: Heeyy!! Silas: Hey, someone's excited. Oliver, deadpan: Yeah, and it's making me sick.

Katherina, who is planning to sneak out with Alisa: We need to distract these guys. Alisa: Leave it to me. Alisa: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss. Roma & Juliette: immediately begin arguing

FHH SPOILERS BELOW

Celia, to Oliver: Sorry it took so long to bail you out of jail. Silas: No, it was my fault actually. I shouldn't have used my phone call to prank call the police station.

Orion, no memories: Can I ask a dumb question? 

Rosalind, exhausted : Better than anyone I know.

Spotify should let me annotate playlists. It's not enough to make a ship/character playlist, I need to explain every single song on there.

Alisa: Welcome to my very first vlog in which I try different haircare products

Alisa: *sprays hairspray into her mouth*

Alisa: Well, right off the bat I can tell you that this one is not very good

As a Croatian i confirm i know who this is

Anything to do with Croatia ever: *happens*

Tumblr:

@one-time-i-dreamt

For the love of god if your native language is different from the majority language of the country you’re living in don’t raise your baby speaking the local language. Either have each parent speak to them in a different language or only speak your native language at home. The kid will be okay. Get your native language in their head. You may think you’re helping them in the long term giving them the local language but no. When they’re an adult they’ll wonder why you never taught them your language. They can and will learn the local language in school. They’ll be okay. Produce more bilingual children. They are good for society.

Current state of matters: zoned out staring blankly into space while the dj in my brain is playing the jeopardy theme

NEED a kind of coffee that won't turn my bladder into a pressure washer every 2 hours

so done with tumblr. see u all in two minutes

Phoebe: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Silas: Several traffic violations, three counts of resisting arrest, roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks, and that’s not my car. Phoebe: ...

Phoebe: What time is it? Orion: I don’t know; pass me that saxophone and we’ll find out Orion: *Plays sax loudly and extremely out of tune* Oliver: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING Orion: It’s 2 am

years ago, I committed the terrible horrible crime of being an annoying sixth grader and I haven't been able to forgive myself since

Secret Shanghai incorrect quotes pt. 3

No particular spoilers this time, just vibes \(^-^)/

___

Rosalind: You look mentally ill.

Celia: I am. Let’s go.

~

Rosalind: Time sensitive question how flirt boy.

Silas: Throw rocks at he.

Alisa: Hot Dogs.

Celia: Kill him.

Rosalind: Thanks guys.

~

Benedikt , opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.

~

Roma: We need a distraction.

Phoebe: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Alisa, whispering: My time has come.

[gets a new mutual] i look forward to working with you

I was messing around with a random incorrect quote generator and decided to use the secret Shanghai characters and here were a few I found could be pretty accurate… (this is not my original idea, I saw someone else do this and tried it out cause I was bored!) (part #1)

hello there i'm a woman in a post apocalyptic society and i wake up every day with perfect eyeliner and zero body hair

quick what is everyone doing right now

Reblog to give the person you reblogged this from a Croissant (🥐).