Buzzbuzz4puffpuff2k18 - Harry Potter Fandom Trash

Coming Clean

Short little fun scene I wrote based on two gifs by @asktheboywholived XD 

Remus is all wet and Sirius is all hot and bothered and utterly confused.

The initial shock was caused by the fact that this had never happened before. Not in the entire six years of sharing a bathroom and a dorm room had anyone ever seen Remus John Lupin without clothes on. 

Well, not entirely. The other Marauders had seen him in the mornings following the full moon, but they were always quick to cover him with a blanket, both to respect his modesty about his scars and to make sure the poor boy didn’t freeze to death in his weakness. No one, however, had ever seen him on a perfectly normal day, in perfectly good health (Or as good as his health could be.) without clothes on.

He was always very meticulous about it. He showered while the others were still sleeping or, in later years, retreated to the privacy of the Prefects’ bathroom. He had mastered the art of changing his clothes faster than you could blink or would do so behind the closed curtains of his bed. 

 So when Sirius walked into the bathroom on an otherwise uneventful Thursday evening to use the toilets, he suddenly found himself choking on air.

There was Remus, completely starkers except for the towel wrapped low around his waist. At least, Sirius was pretty sure it was Remus. That was definitely Remus’ face, and his hair which was darkened from the dampness and dripping streams down his neck, to his muscular shoulders and lower, cascading down the scarred chest and lightly toned abs…

 When had Remus - scrawny, lanky, far-too-thin-and-pale Remus - become that? 

Sirius’ mouth felt dry as he watched the rivulets of water slowly drip down, down, down until they disappeared behind that blasted towel, thinking to himself that the only logical solution would be to lick his friend’s wet, glistening abs before he died of dehydration. 

What the fuck? He wasn’t sure where that thought had come from. Must be some sort of dog thing…should I turn into a dog? Wha-? No, you fucking psychopath, that’s even fucking weirder-

“Alright, Pads?”

Sirius blinked rapidly, tearing his eyes away from the light trail of hair that started at the other boy’s navel and - oh, that bloody towel again - to look at Remus’ face. 

 Remus was looking at him with concerned and confused eyes and Sirius thought he must look like a right git with his mouth hanging open and unable to speak. 

 “I…Er…” He shook himself and cleared his throat. “Erm…Toilets.” 

Remus raised an eyebrow, the corner of his lips twitching up. “Typically what one finds in the restroom, yes.” 

“S-sorry.” Sirius stuttered. What was wrong with him? He forced out a laugh and nodded to his friend. “Just….er…not so typical to find you in here, I suppose?” 

Remus sighed heavily and rolled his eyes. “Peeves flooded the prefect’s bath. I figured everyone else was still out and about and the dorm was empty when I got here so, I took advantage…Besides, I suppose it’s sort of pointless to keep hiding. It’s not like the three of you haven’t seen me in the shack, you know? And that’s a much worse site.” 

Sirius had the urge to tell him that everything he would see from this moment on in his life was a much worse site than the one currently before him. Merlin, he wanted to trace the muscles of the boy’s chest with his tongue - Stop that!

Remus frowned. “Are you sure you’re alright, Sirius? Do you need to see Madam Pomfrey?” Before Sirius knew what was happening, Remus stepped closer until he was right in front of him, barely inches away and Sirius could smell the soap and the shampoo and the Remus. He bit his lip to stop the canine like whine growing in his throat as Remus laid his hand over his forehead. He wondered if Remus’ hands were always that warm or if it was from the hot water. His tongue darted out to wet his lips, only reminding him that if he leaned in just a bit, he could lap up the tiny pool collecting at the junction of Remus’ neck and shoulder. 

No! Bad Dog!

He quickly stepped backwards, plastering a grin on his face and shaking his head. “I’m fine, Moons! Really! I think…I think I’m just thirsty, actually? So…I think I’m going to raid the kitchens for some pumpkin juice, yeah? Anything you’d lick- ah! Er, I mean like?” 

Remus tilted his head to the side, still utterly perplexed by his friend’s odd behavior. “Not that i can think of. Would you like company? I wouldn’t mind a walk if you could wait for me to get dressed…”

No. Thought Sirius. No you should never get dressed. You should never have clothes on ever again. You should stay right here, naked and wet and fuck, do I have some shit to work out…

“Ahh, nope. No company for me, thanks. Actually can’t even wait. Entirely too thirtsy. Dehydration is terrible, you know. Makes your brain all foggy and weird and…well, bye.” He turned and darted from the bathroom before Remus had the chance to respond, forgetting all about his own need to use the facilities and desperate to find James to ask him if he ever thought about licking his friends, if that was even something stags did…

Sorry, no, Rowling knew what she was doing with Snape. She wrote this character a specific way. Also, strictly, she didn't "forgive" Snape. We only see Harry move on from his hatred, that is part of his growth and character development, not Snape's. JKR is well aware that Severus is not a completely good (or completely bad) character - because she wrote him that way! Canon is canon, even and especially if you disagree with it.

You can think what you think, I’m not going to force you to hate Snape

But, even though J.K. said he was in the grey area, she also said he did die to save the wizarding world, implying that, basically, that one act pulls him from “dark” to “grey”

And I mean, yes, that was a big thing. But also, Snape was so obsessed with Lily that he made her his life, despite being a bigoted and racist towards her. So when she died, do you really think Snape wanted to keep living?

It’s almost like the sith (yes, I’m making a Star Wars reference). But imagine that the Empire is the good guys, the Resistance are like Voldemort’s followers, and Snape is Anakin

Keep in mind this analogy won’t be perfect

Snape grew up loving dark magic. He automatically gravitated to The Future Death Eater’s of Slytherin House™

[Parallel: Anakin was raised to be a Jedi, a good guy. He was raised to fight the sith]

Voldemort then killed Lily. Snape was devastated. He didn’t start disliking all the dark magic and the mass killings and the innocents dying, he started disliking the thought that Lily was dead. He then went to Dumbledore.

[Parallel: Anakin thought Padme was in danger. He then turned to the Dark Side because they said it would keep her safe. He didn’t - at first - start hating the Resistance, just wanted to keep Padme safe, and so what if it was with the bad guys]

The love of Snape’s life was dead. He was probably so lost, and probably borderline suicidal. And considering how long he hung on to Lily (since they were kids all the way into adulthood) I doubt he’d be able to get over that depression anytime soon

Yes, he made the choice to die for the Good Guys™ but part of me thinks he wasn’t, like, completely devastated that he might die. And after what Voldemort did to Lily, do you really think he would die for his cause?

And can we also talk about the fact that he tortured the students that weren’t in Slytherin.

I mean, yes, he needed to make sure Voldemort didn’t suspect he was a double agent yadda yadda yadda, but he was horrible

He could have just messed with house points, or favored Slytherin, or been unfair with grades, or even just given out detentions. I mean, we’ve all had bad teachers who were unfair or mean or had stupid rules

But Snape bullied students. Don’t even try to deny it. Like when Hermione had the spell cast that made her teeth grow and he said he didn’t see a difference. There were probably a lot more events that happened that we didn’t even see

And can we talk about Neville’s boggart?

Neville could’ve had so many fears. Bellatrix, for one. The person that tortured his parents into insanity.

Maybe even his aunt, who was constantly beating him up about not being a better wizard or living up to the Longbottom name (she could’ve been like Hermione’s boggart being failing an assignment be like her fear of failure/expulsion/going back to a normal life knowing she’s a wizard)

Maybe his uncle or someone (remember, Neville was hung out of a window in an attempt to make his magical powers appear, and there were a lot of other happenings similar to that)

Heck, Neville was scared of a lot (he was frickin’ brave as heck, don’t get me wrong), yet his boggart was his potions teacher

Who he only saw for a fraction of his day, and not even every day, if I remember correctly.

Snape. Bullied. The. Students.

He was horrible to them. Yes, I won’t deny that, even with what I stated above, giving his life was a huge thing. And he did do a lot of things for Dumbledore and everything.

But he was still a horrible person. And his motives weren’t good. His motive was being overly obsessed with a girl.

Yeah, sure, aw it’s so sweet he still loved her “after all this time” et cetera, et cetera, but can you honestly look at Snape’s love for Lily and everything and tell me that’s healthy?

If we’re talking about soley what Snape has done for Voldemort and the Death Eaters vs. Dumbledore and the Order, sure, we could say he was in a grey area

And I know Harry eventually forgave Snape enough to be okay with him (his naming his son after Severus was, and I’m paraphrasing J.K., not just to honor Snape, but to try and justify that he could be forgiven himself for the deaths at the Battle of Hogwarts)

And yes, Snape gave Harry information to help with winning the war. He wasn’t completely bad. I admit that. But Harry is going to link winning the war, at least partially, with Snape

So of course he would be somewhat redeemed in Harry’s mind.

But if we’re talking about who Snape was as a person (which is what I was referencing to and what I assumed J.K. was referencing to) then I think he is almost all black

But again, you can think whatever you want, I’m not going to force you to believe what I believe

Draco: I could kill you if I wanted to, Potter.

Harry: Yeah? So could another human being.

Draco:

Harry: So could a dog.

Draco:

Harry: So could a dedicated duck.

Draco:

Harry: You aren't special, Draco.

I found a Dustmouth comic I shockingly hadn’t read yet, and now I am completely distraught with Remus-Sirius-school-boyfriends feelings  ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚

I got tagged by @lillyyypottah but not exactly but she mentioned me because I'm her fren tag 9 people you want to get to know better (I'm only doing one because I'm an insecure bean that doesn't know any people) relationship status: single as a fucking pringle (but mentally dating Jensen Ackles) favorite color(s): maroon, navy/dark blue lipstick or chapstick: lipstick I guess, but usually neither because I end up licking it off or something (I know, I know, I'm disgusting) last song listened to: Hurricane by Panic! At the Disco top three shows: Supernatural, Friends, How I Met Your Mother top three characters: Dean Winchester, Chandler Bing, Barney Stinson top three ships: Destiel, Swarkles, Larry (ugh) I tag: @emilyisacoolcat or anyone who feels like it because I just realized I don't know that many people

We all know Sirius loves stupid puns and he’ll annoy everyone with them every chance he gets, making everyone utterly terrified of the word “serious” and anything dog-related, so yes, we’re all tired of such puns, but not Sirius. Never Sirius.

doot doot

HOW DO YOU HAVE TIME FOR THISI appreciate the doot doot

*remus and sirius taking a walk*

sirius: hey moony?

remus: *turns around*

sirius: *gets down on one knee*

remus: *gasps*

sirius: would you hold on a second, i gotta tie my shoes

remus: omg you fucking dork

remus: *smacks sirius*

sirius: *has the biggest smile ever*

Remus gives zero Fs

James & Sirius: [arguing about what the skin between your genitals and your butt is called when Remus walks in]

Sirius: Hey, Remus! What do you call the thing between the dick and the asshole?

Remus: The coffee table.

James & Sirius: [look down at the coffee table in front of them]