Ramblings Of A Lunatic - Blog Posts

Channeling Bella for a bit- she must be terrified when Doey snaps at her because what if it means he doesn't like her anymore? What if he's bored of carrying her around and hearing her problems? If she gets taken off this project she'll go back to the work yard where no one wants to talk to her. The scientists might even consider her defective and just terminate her! What can she do, how can she make things better when the only thing she can do is talk? Is she even worth talking to anymore? It's going to be a long, painful silence until He decides to talk again.

I'm just gonna put what @squidling2005 put in the tags on this post as well:

And I am just going to grin very very loudly because I have clearly done something right here where people are going "Oh no???" from both sides of the fence ehehe. I was so worried that interaction would feel very one-sided, so the sheer relief I feel knowing that both sides make sense... and both of you are completely on the money. Before a sort of system, understanding is worked out it is a long and drawn out thing.

Neither of them know how to make the first move here. Bella is hyper aware of how much her entire situation hinges on him caring, if she makes him upset and he decides to stop caring anymore, she's toast. Course... somehow, the scariest part of that thought was the idea that he wouldn't want to be her friend anymore. It felt...realer, made her stomach hurt and her throat clench. He was a bit weird but he was also so nice and even though it was her fault the scientists could make him do all those things he didn’t want to, he never got mad at her for it… she pushed too hard, she could barely remember how to be a friend and she messed it all up.

Doey meanwhile is drowning under his own guilt, quite literally pressing himself as far into the corner as he can. He’s not bad they just made him wrong! He couldn’t help his head got so loud! And and and and- and he almost bit her, if he bit her she would probably die wouldn’t she? He hadn’t ever bitten anything living before but he knew very confidently she wouldn't survive… but even if she didn’t she would never like him again. She would be smart not to, why would you be friends with someone who hurt you… so he curls up as tight as he can and stays as far away as he can. Ofc this only can last so long, Doey is given a small (very small) amount of leniency with his form shifting but soon Bella is getting zapped and he has to pull himself back in shape.

I think at first they handle it by pretending nothing happened, they sit quietly at opposite ends of the room until he gets shuffled off to his containment cell for the night, then the next morning when reunited for work they just pretend the whole situation hadn’t even happened. They’re both kids, they don’t know what they’re doing, so they assume if they don’t talk about it then they can pretend it didn’t happen- until it happens again, and it’s worse. They end up sitting in silence for a while… but I think he makes the first move

Afterwards, while it doesn’t go perfect because they both lack the ability to truly explain how they feel and both are incredibly hesitant to admit their true thoughts, the pair of them manage to establish some understanding. Sometimes his head gets very, very loud, and when it happens he has to sit very quietly until it goes away. He didn’t mean to yell or bite, he didn’t mean to scare, he doesn’t want her to be scared of him. He promises he won’t do it again, he will, he will be much better!!

And Bella cries, or as close to crying as she can get in this body, because she didn’t mean to make him upset and she was so so afraid he didn’t like her anymore. And of course he is immediately insisting, desperately so, that he still likes her, that he was never mad at her!!! He’s not capable of crying anymore physically, but he has memories of the sounds, he can make those still. They manage to bumble their way through the idea that sometimes he gets very mad at nothing and yells at everything. Once again, it’s not perfect, no one feels great, but there is a sense of understanding.

Lucas helps a lot, for as loud and goofy as he is he clearly understands what is happening a lot better than both of them combined. Kids are observant, even if they don’t fully understand what they are observing, but both Lucas and Bella learn the signs of when he needed space. Were they older, more experienced, I am sure a way to actually help him through these moments could have been figured out, but the best they can do is just let them pass by.

Hopefully this comic text hybrid makes sense and is alright!! I had some ideas I didn’t know how to type, and some I couldn’t quite draw haha!

LET ME COOK

DO U GUYS

DO YOU GUYS THINK THAT MAYBE

JUST MAYBE

CROSSHAIR MIGHT KNOW THAT TECH IS AN OPERATIVE (SPECIFICALLY THE ONE HE WAS THROWING HANDS WITH)

OK LIKE HEAR ME OUT BUT

Crosshair definitely is STILL hiding something. The operatives make him MADLY uncomfortable- the sense of strange brotherhood between them scares him more than anything we’ve seen so far, maybe because, well, loyalty is a big deal to him, but also because one of them may actually be his brother.

He did not mention he was being put through operative✨ pre school ✨until Howzer pressed for answers, and he was forced to spill some beans. But I don’t think that’s all he’s keeping secret. Like, he wanted to keep the operative as FAR away from his brothers as possible(ie, drawing fire away, 1v1ing)- why? Could it just be he wants to deal with these clones on his own? Spare his brothers the fight? Protect them?

Or is it because he doesn’t want to traumatize them further with a brainwashed Tech? He doesn’t want their memory of their “dearly departed” brother to be marred by this…hollow, empty assassin before him. He can’t do that to them. But he *knows*, and it’s eating him alive.

There’s still so much he’s keeping from everyone, and not even Omega knows what he witnessed on Tantiss. He knows things, and he’s too afraid to admit them.

…..IDK THESE EPISODES KILLED ME MENTALLY THEY WERE SO GOOD BUT LEFT ME WITH SO MANY QUESTIONSSSSS AHHH

Plussss I wanna see more Hunter and wrecker content PLEASE my pookies need more screen time before I become a crosswhore AND Hunter girlie (one Star Wars man obsession is ENOUGH PLEASE).

ALSO THE THEORY THAT HUNTER DIES THIS SEASON IS KINDA STARTING TO FERMENT IN MY BRAIN BC WHY ELSE WOULD THEY ESTABLISH CROSSHAIR AS AN INCREASINGLY PARENTAL, DADDY MATERIAL GUY??? ESPECIALLY WITH HUNTER NOTICING OMEGA AND CROSS GROWING CLOSER I am ill do not let me think

I can see it now, Hunter sacrifices himself, but before he does, he tells Crosshair that “I know you’ll protect her. I trust you.” And then he fucking DIES, content with knowing Crosshair can be her newfound dad and protect her when he can no longer do so (I am in pain).

also when Hunter stood up for Crosshair >>>>> THATS MY MAN YALL HE WAS FR LIKE “ay man only I can shit on my brother man fuck off”

ALSO when Crosshair said “too bad” something changed in me (trying to resist crosswhore feelings)

There are two wolves inside of me (Hunter Wife (he’s the love of my LIFE) and Crosswhore) (actually three bc I’m also. A wrecker simp.)

"Hi everyone, today I am dming the session from the asylum so I apologise in advance for the poor quality of my Internet and my mic. Last session we left of with Sclimith eating the boss and..."

I am violently cut off as the hospital doctor tase me and sedate me before throwing me in a room with white cushions on the walls.

Im having another one of my thoughts tangents but stars above do I wonder.

(this is just my interpretation btw I love multiple versions of the Bad Sanses)

Does Dust think that the bad Sanses would be selfish? Is there a reasonable reason for him to join the Bad Sanses in some versions? He killed his entire underground thinking it was a more merciful kill than them having to go through the constant resets and he couldn't take it anymore before losing his mind. I think just making him stereotypically "psycho" doesn't give him the justice I see much of. I think the idea of taking away the happy endings of others is impossible for him, especially in specific timelines. I think that the versions of each Bad Sans having their own reasons would be fun, like how I imagine he could've been convinced by Pap to go in order to not Starve.

Don't even get me STARTED on Saint, either. He, in my opinion, joins the Bad Sanses to provide safety and food for the underground. His whole character is defending and caring for the underground despite his rough edges. It's not like he would abandon his brother and village when they're victims of fate and cruel circumstances. The idea that Killer killed everyone to just FEEL something? At least there's some level of understanding for Dust even if he also would dislike him. I've always seen Saint as a character always wanting to protect the weak, or at least protect helpless monsters in bad situations. That could lead to a whole way of him bonding with Dust for that matter

If I'm to think of Killer in the way everyone™ in the fandom sees him, he would have the least justification.

,,,,BUT WHAT IF I THINK OF SOMETHING A LITTLE DIFFERENT?

What if Killer decided to join the human to try and stop the resets like Dust? That his method wasn't just to "stop feeling awful" or to "feel nothing at all." I think Sans as a character is very fascinating, and I like to personally think he would pair with Chara as a way not to stop Frisk, but rather to stop the player. It would be interesting to think a part of Chara and Sans are fused into a soul rather than Killer y'know,,,,killing them. I don't care for the evil Chara interpretations, and I think this could lead to a more empathetic light to a character (Killer) with a really cool concept. It's a shame to me that out of all the Bad Sanses, Killer has the least justification and doesn't have that slice of humanity in him that could give him empathy from people in the community

These are just my personal takes, even if whoever reads this may think they're bad takes. Again, I LOVE almost every version someone has of a character so many people can interpret in different ways. I just like adding my own twist to try and pump more depth into each of these silly guys

Thanks for reading if you read this much of my rambling🙂‍↕️🫶