Barbara Gordon X Reader - Blog Posts

𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐦 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐥...

batman's cape (and any of the other batfam member's capes) are heated/can be microwaved :D.

...yeah, probably not the most original thought. surely someone has come up with this before, and hey, maybe it's even canon - but that doesn't really take away any of the ideas I have, so on we go anyways lmao.

I imagine that you, y/n, reader (lol idk-) is often found all wrapped up in bruce's cape (ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S FRESH OUT OF THE WASH) and he'll be TEARING the manor apart looking for that shit because why would it be anywhere else except in the bat-cave, in his bat-suit vault, right there clipped onto the specific bat-suit he's choosing to wear for whatever mission he's finna go on, just to eventually find you on a couch somewhere above the bat-cave all rolled up like a worm in it with the glow of your phone emitting from underneath the fabric and your little giggles muffled by it because you're probably laughing at memes or something idk.

bruce is definitely the type to think it's silly and lowkey can't even blame you because it do be cold in the mansion, but he also refuses to drop the "I'm so hardcore and a brute and stone cold" act so he's yanking that shit offa' you and you're just BEWILDERED, suddenly exposed to the light and cold like, "😮⁉️🫨⁉️" and before you can even process wtf happened, bruce is already whisking around the corner, gone and out of sight💀.

dick would also think it's silly, but lowkey actually be annoyed, though, and he'd make that KNOWN. like, sure, he'd initially be VERY stressed when he can't find the cape (even though it's not thay big of a deal but for some reason, he just doesn't feel "complete" without it😭) but then he'd see this huge lump all wrapped up in it on a bed in one of the many rooms or something. at first, he'd think it's one of the handful of pets owned and living in the wayne estate, just to peel back the fabric and see YOU.

"...Hi😃..."

"...🙂Why are- Nevermind. You do know that I need this, right?"

"I mean,,, you don't need it, you just-"

*YANK!!*

"NO, WAIT, IT'S COLD!!"

"THEN GET A BLANKET!!"

I'm sorry, but I feel like dick don't play 'bout his cape, and you're just either gonna have to find different ways to sneak it or just leave it tf alone😭✋🏽. but when it's not currently in dire need by him, he'll happily return it to you and smile when you squeal and wrap yourself back up in and under it while it warms up.

BARBARA GETS IT FR. SHE GETS ✨️🩷YOU🩷✨️. but also, she is attached to it in the way dick is, so don't be surprised if and when she needs it, she's taking it from you with zero mercy and under the excuse of, "I'm on duty tonight, I'm not showing up out of uniform lol." and you're just left there like "☹️...". but outside of those times, the both of you can be found very happily and contently under her cape as you watch horror movies or something and rambling about who knows what, a common interest lol.

and I'm pretty sure in some strains/universes or whatever of dc, she ends up becoming oracle because she's paralyzed or some shit, right?? I could totally be wrong, but if I'm not, I feel like in that case, she just GIVES it to you. she makes it a huge deal, too, she acts like she's passing along the magical ashes of a dead ancestor that grants you infinite knowledge and protection or some shit and has a whole speech prepared, just for her to hand you this neatly folded up cloth and you're just like, "...You're giving me your cape😀??" and she's like, "Ya🙂♡." and you can't even be mad because ...

IT'S A HEATED CAPE like idk what else you could want from her like plz✋🏽.

(*casually skips over Tim bc idk enough about him and if I mischaracterized him I'd have to delete this account and then me off of the face of this earth bc I refuse to be that bitch who doesn't know her shit😃*)

jason will see you with his cape, and whether you're awake or asleep, he'll loom over you menacingly until you sense his presence, and then not even give you the chance to give excuses before he's like, "I'm on watch tonight."

you don't dare protest lmao. and he isn't giving it back to you later on. it's one of those things that if you really want it, you gotta go get it. and then expect you won't have it for very long, so whatever you plan on doing with it, you better make the most of it😭✋🏽. that's literally all I can say for him lmao.

DAMIAN (my fave) (^3^)/. I feel like he'd make it seem like SUCH an inconvenience for himself even though he doesn't actually care about the cape itself and if anything, finds it very sweet and endearing that you literally use it as a blanket because "it gets so warm" and "it smells like you" and "it's here when you're gone and I miss you". but, much like his father, he just HAS to keep up the, "I'm so stone cold and no nonsense and eternally vexed" facade, so if you're awake and you have it, he'll just hold out his hand expectingly and - like jason - you don't dare argue because you're just gonna lose🥲.

but if he finds the cape and you're asleep with/under it, he'll actually let you keep it. like, he'll just leave it and either go about his superhero duties without the cape entirely, or he'll just use another one from a different suit. sure, it might possess different capabilities (no pun intended), or he might feel a little... off... without a cape, but he'd rather that than interrupt your comfortable state.

and you'll be so bent up about it when he returns, and you're like, "WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TAKE IT😭💔?!" and he's like, "you were obviously very comfortable, I didn't want to disturb you😐..........🫶🏼."

so um.... yeah, I honeslty dk where all of that came from, but do with this info what you will.

byeeee /ᐠ^ω^マ~ !!