Anon, Keep In Mind That She Has Spent Her Whole Life Being Prepared For Courtly Life Without Any Care

Agreed. Plus there are no details about the specific job itself. It could just be a management job. I was considered a manager when I got my first supervisor position. I highly doubt she is the store manager.

Sent by anonymous

‘i wish the freshman/the sophomore was more realistic. like today’s chapter, becca’s been working at uskea for, like, what? three months, tops? and she just lands the management position just like that. realism, who? it’s her very first job and she has no prior work experience, and yet? like, i get she’s been working hard to be a good employee, but that alone isn’t going to get you a management position after only three months (at most). it’s not that i want characters to suffer unnecessarily or anything, but i would like there to be some realistic consequences within this universe of rose petals and conveniences. i feel like it would have been better for becca to not get the management job, because that’s what would have actually happened irl in most situations, and i think it would help her realize even more that sometimes life just doesn’t go the way we want it, and sometimes it’s disappointing, but that we can still carry on and do our best in spite of that. but instead it feels like becca’s life lessons ring kind of hollow because everyone in the freshman sophomore universe always gets what they want in the end, they always win, they’re always deliriously happy and never disappointed and it’s just not realistic. again, i’m not saying i want everyone to suddenly suffer or only be ravaged with pain consequence after painful consequence, but it’s a bit too perfect of a world for the tfts cast, and it reads kind of boring and trite sometimes.’

POST/CONFESSIONS DO NOT REFLECT THE MOD’S PERSONAL OPINIONS!

That is too relatable.

The most relatable tweet

Writer goals: Fanart based on your writings

RULE #1: Use them sparingly.

Comparisons draw attention to themselves, like a single red tulip in a sea of yellow ones. They take the reader out of the scene for a moment, while you describe something that isn’t in it, like you’re pushing them out of the story. They require more thought than normal descriptions, as they ask the reader to think about the comparison, like an essay question in the middle of a multiple choice test. They make the image stand out, give it importance, a badge of honor of sorts.

Use too many comparisons and they become tedious. 

Elevating every single description is like ending each sentence with an exclamation point. Eventually, the reader decides no one could possibly shout this much, and starts ignoring them. 

For these reasons, you should only use metaphorical language when you really want to make an image stand out. Save them for important moments. 

RULE #2: Use comparisons that fit into the world of your story.

If you’re writing from the point of view of a character who’s only ever lived in a desert, having that character say, “her look was as cold as snow” doesn’t make much sense. That character isn’t likely to have experienced snow, so it wouldn’t be a reference point to them. They’d be more likely to compare the look to a “moonless desert night” or something along those lines.

Using a comparison that ties to the character’s history or the setting of the story also do work to build the world of the story. It gives you a chance to show the reader exactly what your character’s reference points are, and builds the story’s world. If your reader doesn’t know that desert nights can get cold, this comparison informs both the things its describing: the other character’s look and the desert at night. 

Here’s a metaphor from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy:

If you took a couple of David Bowies and stuck one of the David Bowies on the top of the other David Bowie, then attached another David Bowie to the end of each of the arms of the upper of the first two David Bowies and wrapped the whole business up in a dirty beach robe you would then have something which didn’t exactly look like John Watson, but which those who knew him would find hauntingly familiar.

He was tall and he was gangled.

This is a bizarre comparison, but it’s also a bizarre story. What’s more, David Bowie is known for his persona “Ziggy Stardust” and songs like “Space Oddity.” Bringing him up in a book about a man from Earth traversing the galaxy makes sense. What’s more it increases both of those aspects of the story: its ties to space and its bizarre-ness. The comparison unifies the story and the language being used to tell the story. 

Using comparisons that fit into the world ensures that everything is working to help tell the story you want to tell.

RULE #3: Match the tone to the thing being described. 

Or, match it to the way you want the thing being described to come across. It has to match what you want the reader to feel about the thing being described. 

Here’s an example from Mental Floss’s “18 Metaphors & Analogies Found in Actual Student Papers” (although I think it’s actually from a bad metaphor writing contest):

She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

You’re not imagining a laugh right now, are you? You’re imagining a dog throwing up. Whoever this girl is, you’re going to make sure never to tell a joke in front of her.

This is not getting the right point across. 

Remember the David Bowies? Remember how the comparison was fun and bizarre, just like the tone of the book is fun and bizarre? 

This is not David Bowies stacked on top of one another. 

It’s not enough for a comparison to be accurate. It has to bring about the same emotions as the thing it’s describing. 

If this is being told from the point of view of a character who hates the laughing character and we’re supposed to hate her and her laugh. It actually does work, but from the use of the word “genuine,” I don’t think this is the case. 

Make sure you always pay attention to the tone of the comparison. 

RULE #4: Keep them simple.

Don’t use a comparison that requires too much thought on the reader’s part. You never want anyone sparing even a moment on the question: “but how is x like y?”

Here’s another example from that Mental Floss list: 

Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

Again, this is a humorous example. It’s supposed to be bad, but many writers have made mistakes like it. They choose two images that don’t have enough in common for the reader to make an easy and obvious comparison between the two. Sometimes, the writer subconsciously acknowledges this, and expands the comparison to a paragraph, detailing the ways the two things are alike. 

If you find yourself doing this, take a step back and ask yourself if this is really the best comparison to be using. The best comparisons are the simple ones. All the world’s a stage. Conscience is a man’s compass. Books are the mirrors of the soul. 

What about that David Bowie quote, you ask? Douglas Adams broke this rule, but he broke it purposefully to get that bizarre quality to the language. He still avoids reader confusion, the reason for this rule, by bringing the comparison back to its point at the end: “he was tall and he was gangled.”

RULE #5: Avoid cliches. 

The best comparisons are fresh ones. No one wants to hear that she had “skin as white as snow” and lips “as red as roses” anymore. The slight understanding it brings to the description isn’t worth the reader’s groans when they realize you just made them read that again. 

A cliche is a waste of space on the page. It’s not going to be the memorable line you want it to be. It’s not going to awe the reader. 

Good similes in metaphors require some creative thinking. 

In the vein of rosy lips and snow-colored skin, here’s a fun example from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. It’s the poem that Ginny wrote for Harry on Valentine’s Day:

His eyes are as green as a fresh pickled toad,

His hair is as dark as a blackboard. 

I wish he was mine, he’s really divine, 

The hero who conquered the Dark Lord.

These aren’t comparisons you’re like to have come across before and their originality comes from rules #2 and #3. Rowling needed comparisons that fit in Ginny’s frame of reference. She also needed comparisons that were humorously bad, as they’re being recited by a grumpy creature dressed in a diaper, who is sitting on Harry’s ankles, forcing him to listen. 

As a witch at school, blackboards and fresh pickled toads fit Ginny’s frame of reference. Neither are particularly known for being nice to look at, so they fit the tone, too. 

Using her character, setting, and tone, using, in other words, her story, Rowling was able to create similes that are unique and memorable. 

It’s the same thing Adams did with his Bowie analogy. 

If you, too, use your story to inform your language, writing new and wonderful similes and metaphors should be just as simple. 

when I was 14 I worked in a grocery store and one day I got to bag Stephen King’s groceries and of course, being the little horror fiction nerd I am I was completely starstruck

I think he thought I was gonna ask for an autograph because I was not even lowkey staring I was full on moon-faced and bouncing and he kept looking over at me hesitantly like aw jeez kid fuck off

anyways I finally managed to squeak out that I was a huge fan and asked for advice on writing, “how do I write as well as you do?” in my horrible thick German accent and broken ass English and he gave me the best writing advice I have ever received

“shit kid, stop worrying about how other people do it and just write your story”

14 years later my wife and I nearly hit him with our car because he was jaywalking

Everyone who gets like really into Greek mythology either ends up worshipping the gods, studying classics, gay, or somehow all three at once

Wow, I can personally relate to just about every single example. I am so happy to know I am not alone.

Auditory Processing Problems

• *someone says something* “what?” *repeats themselves* “sorry?” *repeats themselves again* “pardon?”

•"hey, y'see the red thing at the top of the shelf, will you get it?“ “Sorry, what?” “On the sh-” “oh yeah sure, I’ll get it.”

•*doesn’t hear teacher because someone’s pen is making a scratchy sound at the back of the room*

•*replays video 10 ten times to figure out what they’re saying*

•teachers asking, “why do you always stop writing in the middle of a sentence, just write down whatever I’m saying,” followed by the response, “I’m just processing it,” rebuked by, “we’ll stop processing it and just write.”

•*gets really focused on staring out the window and goes through four songs without hearing a single on*

I want an Eevee 😢

I just do not see how it would be possible at all. The storytelling is too dependent on the LI's problems. They would have to kill off every LI because otherwise they would have to write five seperate parts to avoid huge weird gaps. And you know that will never happen.

Okay like I know none of the LIs are dead in TF/TS cuz like that’s so cruel but at the same time I can totally see PB being THAT extra and that petty like “oh y’all don’t like TF/TS? Fine then what if we KILL OFF YOUR LI!!!”

Swallows & Damsons, South Yorkshire, England