Luka, Saki, Meiki, Nene And Akito In Their Matching Fits 🗽

Rendering this hoe is the hardest thing I’ve done all night 💔

HEY HOE 😭 no cus im actually PISSED my account got FUCKING TEMRINDSVKIENFLAEIFHLAIE LIKE

I didint even DO ANUTHJINGIGSIH 💔💔😭😭😭😭💔💔💔🚬🚬⛓️⛓️⛓️⛓️

justice for rhea guys……..

Something about Nicole’s suicide ending fills me with such indescribable sadness that I don’t know how to describe. The fact she’s just hanging there, the room was dark, the computer was on, the bed was not made, the whole house was dead silent. Don’t even get me SYARTED on the suicide note either:

“People are books, puzzles and pawns. In that order. First theyre read, then they’re figured out, then they’re persuaded”

People are read, figured out and persuaded as Nicole says herself, but theyre also open, confusing or difficult and gullible. In that order can be a reference to Nicole before the game, listing to her mom’s advice and being a “nice” child, but ending up being gullible and vulnerable in the end. Being confusing/difficult can be Nicole struggling to “fit in” in society, with the mindset and attitude she has.

“Some would call that wrongly manipulative but whats the alternative? Basically any advice my mom’s ever given me. “Dont be mean, don’t judge, be open,”,”

Nicole doesnt see another option besides manipulating people or being stupidly nice, with no in between. It shows the difference between how both of them think you should supposed ply act in society. Nicole thinks you should figure out how to change people to have control and ‘not get hurt’, whilst her mum thinks that you should be respectful, and - in Nicole’s eyes - vulnerable. An open target, really.

“And yeah sure but, that only works when men don’t wanna have sex with you. Be tolerant of guys who get off by choking you, no way that goes south.”

Nicole recognises that she CAN act like her mum says, she knows it’s an option, except she’s also aware that men do see woman as objects and things to stick their dicks in, and in a place where she is mostly interacting with men, it crosses it off as something she can do, because she knows if she does, she WILL get hurt. She’s aware that she’s supposed to ignore the warnings and calls it out but she’s also aware that she won’t be heard, by a majority of people.

“Whats wrong with a pizza delivery-boy with no career goals? Whens the last time you asked a pizza delivery-boy if he’s a rapist?”

I feel you can interpret this im different ways. I personally see it in two different lights - sarcastic (people like crispin are seen as people with no career goals, or realistic ones, and he’s most likely (obviously in Nicole’s eyes) a rapist, yet no one ever checks because they’re seen as less educated) and Nicole seeing no problem with ‘settling down’ with someone who doesn’t have a bright future ahead of him (idk I feel like this is a reach and doesnt make sense but this is the best I can describe what im thinking 😭)

“Theyre called warning signs, but ignoring them makes you a nice person. And one day, if you’re a nice enough girl you’ll end up just like me”

If you call out people on shit behaviour, you’re seen as ‘disrespectful’ or something along those lines. If you ignore them, you might have a good life, but in the end you will be caught up in vulnerability. Nicole frequently called out and accused men of inappropriate behaviour, and she was both hated for it and liked for it, however in the end, she called out someone who didn’t have a line to cross and in the end she couldn’t ’handle?’ It, the pressure and most likefesr of what would happen to her, as again, the men in this game dont have a line they can cross.

“And just like my dad”

This is such a line. Nicole’s dad killed himself, yeah, and Nicole could just be referencing the fact they both died the same way, but were not told why he kills himself, we just know it’s apparently Nicole’s fault. This could open up so many different reasons on why he did it (Nicole’s mum giving him less visitation rights, the divorce, etc etc or just being under pressure). I think my favourite thoughts in this line is that potentially, Nicole knew why her dad killed himself, and only she alone had the actual reason, which is why she says it - knowing people will just think it’s because they’re both dead/died the same way

If you’re reading this, im dead.

Very obvious, shes dead.

Sorry if this is out of reach Icl as I was writing this I lwk confused myself 💔 but uhhhhhhhhh lmk how you felt abt it?? CUS I CANT BE THE ONLY ONE WHO WNTS TO ACTUALLY START CRYING WHEN THEY SEE THE IMSGE RIGHT???

Someone needs to take away the mha editors phone privileges I’ve been sitting here crying for the past 20 minutes

flipside would've been better if we had more shit like jecka seeing the hatman and less foot fetish and jecka getting trafficked

No ✂️

queef queen quinn

r u high😭

Wip 😓

👅👅👅 ur my favorite person

I like to think Nicole's dad was somewhat an meh parent, who did the basics but nothing more, so Nicole sqw him as lazy mostly, so that combined with her pedo brother gave Nicole the view that men are lazy pedophilic pricks (the pricks part comes from her mum's ex husband's 👅)

Tumblr's being stupid ugly weird and won't let me respond but yes!! 'Twas my birthday thank you @myl0v3l1f3

I haven't had many sad Nicole headcanon ideas but I have a lot of opinions about her and her dad so l'll use those.

Even after everything, Nicole doesn’t hate her dad. She always craved his love and validation. So through her grief, she feels like a loser when she reminisces on the actual good times with him when she was a little kid. After what he did she fully decided that he was an asshole no matter what. When she has bad depression days, her mind drifts to when he would play his favorite cassette tapes in the car when he'd pick her up from school, or the few times she can remember him putting one of her drawings on the fridge.

This, mixed with her brother obviously being a predator shaped her views about all men which led to her trying her best to ruin every relationship her mom has been in and taking advantage to other boys/ men in her life. I don’t think this is much of a hot take as one of her core principles is “all men are evil and boys will just grow up to be evil so what’s the point in treating them like people?” I don’t think it’s right but it’s not hard to see why she sees the world that way, I just like analyzing her as a character.

When she was a younger kid (maybe that preteen phase), she had a stepdad that was truly a decent guy. He tried to get to know her and would take her out to eat when her mom was being extra mean. She still didn’t like him because she didn’t want some guy trying to be her dad when she still had one, he just lived a town over it’s not like he was dead. She was pretty averse to the guy being nice to her but she eventually began to open up just enough to let him hug her. Unfortunately a few weeks later, him and her mom got divorced and they had to move again.

She gets really angry when she feels even a little sad about her dad and it doesn't get better until she's an adult and she finally goes to therapy.

I don't like Nicole's mom but Nicole has a bad habit of saying she's gonna off herself "like dad" when they get in screaming matches and for those moments, her mom has a piece of clarity like "Oh wow my daughter needs help." but then they just go back to their cycle of not speaking and arguing.

Her dad began to push her away shortly after him and her mom got divorced and she never got a clear answer as to why. When she would ask her mom “Why doesn’t dad like me!” her moms bitterness would show through with her just saying “He’s a broke loser. Don’t worry about what he thinks” which didn’t make her feel all that much better.

This was gonna be way shorter but now I’m on a roll so I’m gonna write a thing analyzing Nicole’s relationship with/ view on men so thank you for giving me more brain worms.

Wip of my jeckole fic (with emiari, Aricole and Jeckelly mentioned :3)

Nicole wasn’t jealous.

Nicole wasn’t jealous, definitely not. How could she? Jealousy wasn’t a regular emotion she felt. However, the fact that Jecka’s fingers were carefully placed next to Kelly’s, perfectly pink painted nails resting lightly against the others white ones. Jecka’s flushed face and excited eyes, following Kelly’s mindless movements. The way the piss yellow lighting of Jecka’s lightbulb reflected off of her equally piss coloured eyes (they weren’t really) really irked Nicole for no aparent reason. Probably the fact that Kelly was Jecka’s ex. Just by the fact that she was currently alone, perched in the thorn ridden bush next to the kitchen window, squinting into the bedroom window, said everything you needed to know. Nicole couldn’t see much, but from what she could see, apart from the plumes of smoke and echoes of fake sounding laughter, it seemed that Jecka and Kelly were having a good time.

Bullshit, Jecka didn’t have fun with anyone else.

Nicole wanted to gag, this was disgusting behaviour, she felt like Jeffery, or the hoodie version of Harold. Or Hudson. Fuck, what was Melanie’s (wait, was that even her name?) boyfriend’s name again? Whatever, it didn’t matter. If jecka was going to hang out with Kelly, Nicole was going to hang out with Ari. If that bitch let her near the porch anyway, and if Emily wasn’t there too (Nicole could give less of a shit if Emily was there or not, but Ari had some unnecessary fear that Emily might throw herself at Nicole and start eating her face off).

This was a really unhealthy mindset for Nicole to have, but she couldn’t help it. After moving so many times, failed friendships, her trust being broken like it was her mom cooking spaghetti (not that she cooked often), it wasn’t an unreasonable fear. Jecka had been keeping Nicole alive for the past what, ten? Eleven months? She didn’t want to die when gay marriage still wasn’t legalised, or before Jeffery, that cunt deserved to die first.

“Fuck- ow!?” Nicole hissed, a long yet small thorn embedded in the back of her hand. She really needed to stop hiding in this fucking bush. There was definitely a better place to watch her girlfriend through her window without being caught. She fumbled in her jeans pocket for a second before sliding her sidekick out, thumbs running along the keyboard.

“Caan…I…come..uh….overr…” Nicole murmured as she typed, “question mark….and sent!”

Her lips quirked slightly as she sent it, somewhat proud of herself for genuinly no reason at all. Maybe for being alive right now? Yeah, that seems good.

It didn’t take long before the device buzzed as that desperate bitch responded

Nicole’s smirk was quickly whipped off of her face, lips curling into something of disgust, “the fuck does she mean no!?” She snapped loudly.

“Did you hear that?”

Shit. Her heart practically leapt into her throat, as she fell backwards into that god forsaken bush again. She really needed to learn how to be quiet sometimes.

Being silent for nearly ten minutes seemed to make everything better, so now Nicole could go back to hating.

“What the fuck does she mean no?” She whispered loudly, eyebrows furrowing. This was about to become a long, long night that Nicole might not last through.

——

“Nicole, I said no, what part of that did you not understand?!”

“the no part,” Nicole replied dryly, hands resting lazily in her hoodie pockets, hair wild and thorns stuck to the fabric she wore. In front of her, Ari stood angrily, cheeks flushed to the point it blended in with her hair.

“Well fuck off! Im busy!” She scorned, arms crossed tightly over her chest, but it didn’t do much to try and hide what Ari was obviously embarrassed about. Obviously, her normally freckled chalky skin was stained with deep red and purple marks, from Emily of course. Nicole didn’t even have to see that bitch to know.

“Ari, if your embarrassed about the hickies, I didn’t even notice them-“

“Yes you did! Stop lying to me?” Shit, maybe she was immune to the manipulation now, Nicole thought. That must be the only reason that Ari wasn’t letting her in now. She had tried her sexy voice like, four weeks ago and that didn’t work because she was still outside of that fucking front door.

“Okay well maybe I did, but I can ignore them,” Nicole offered half heartedly, head slowly tilting to the side

“No,” Ari stood her ground, for once, she wasn’t being a spineless fish, “Go home Nicole, or bother Jecka, just fuck off,”

Her jaw hinge felt like it was about to shatter in a second, sending vibrations through her teeth when her jaw clenched at that fucking whore’s name. She had never felt her body respond like that - normally she’d just get hard.

“What?” Ari seemed to notice something was off, not that she cared or was interested, but Nicole still hadn’t moved away from her house, “You’re still not coming inside, so move, come on,”

“Im not a dog,” Nicole blinked herself out of that moment of silent spite, “stop speaking to me like that, bitch. Let me inside,”

“Nicole I already said no! Fuck. Off,”

“Ari just let me inside for fucks sake!”

Neither of them knew what just came out of Nicole’s mouth but her voice carrying desperate pleading was not it. Nicole intended that to come out forcefully and somewhat angrily, but it in fact was the opposite. That was more embarrassing than getting caught in that fucking bush (Nicole wasn’t letting it go. She was gonna tell jecka to get rid of it because the fact she had thought of it like, twelve times now, was ridiculous).

“…are you begging right now?” Ari asked confused, yet amused.

Lmk if it’s out of character 🥸

RHEA I NEED ANOTHER FIC FROM YOU😭😭😭😭 IF I READ THAT EMICOLE ONE AGAIN IM GOANNA CRQWHD TF OUT ANYWAY FAV SHIP??

DID YOU READ MY NICOLE BEDROOTINF FIC AND THE EMIJECKOLE ONE 😭

ANYWAY I HAVE ABOUT TEN FAVOURITE SHIPS SO ILL JUST LIST THEM IN ORDER FROM BEST TO LEAST

jeckole

Emiari

Emicole

Jeckily

Emijeckole

Ari Cole

Jeckari

Jeckelly

Megkelly

Jeckaren

Also im if im drawing a trans character as a kid do I draw them as their before gener or now gender…????