Aren't You The One Who Wrote A Fic With Chan Where The Reader Was A Firefighter?? Because I Swear I Read

[Hanahaki] [SKZ Han JiSung x M!Reader]

[‼️Trigger Warning‼️ Character Death]

Since the day you broke up, officially with none other than the love of your life, you once believed, Han JiSung. You were the greatest couple of the century in the K-pop industry. Everyone knew the both of you. JiSung from Stray Kids, the rising popular boy group and you, as a rising soloist in Korea.

Everyone knew about your relationship ever since the both of you came out about dating each other and that was four years ago, even before SKZ debuted. You were deeply in love with JiSung and the world could see it. The way you look at him, the way you talk to him, the way you smiled to him, the world was envious. JiSung happened to be the most luckiest person on earth to have you as his boyfriend.

It was four years into the relationship, the both of you had debuted and successfully reached at the peak of your career. You decided it was time, time to make Han JiSung, to be the love of your life to eternity and beyond. You planned to propose to the rapper. Everything was set up, you had booked a candle light dinner at JiSung’s favourite restaurant, you had asked for blessing from his parents, you had carved his name on the engagement ring personally and where else could anything go wrong?

What seems to be a perfect life for you turns out to be a disaster. You grinned, taking light steps towards the training room, where you have told Lee Know to help you lure JiSung in. The training room was the first place you have ever set eyes on JiSung and it held a very significant meaning to both of you. The training room was your first everything. Your first touch, your first hug, your first confession, your first kiss.

“Sungie~, we have to tell M/N the truth, this is wrong. We can’t keep it a secret anymore.” You heard the voice as you were nearing to the entrance.

“I can’t Hyung. I don’t want to hurt M/N. We can keep it a secret, no one needs to know.” You heard your boyfriend said to the dancer. You peeled through the parted doors, regretting instantly as you felt your heart shatters into pieces so thin that it was impossible to fix. JiSung was kissing Lee Know.

You felt the tears accumulate in your eyes, as you clutch the fabric of your shirt, almost ripping it. You bit your lips to choke back the threatening sobs and you ran. You ran as fast as your feet could bring you, going into your studio, locking the doors and you broke down. You felt your chest tightened as you gasped for air, something was not right. Your throat itches as if something was in it. You violently coughed, bent over on your knees as tears clouded your vision. A couple of petals had left your lips, drenched in blood right beneath you. Shit, you mentally cursed.

You didn’t realise how long the time had passed. You were still cooped inside your studio, staring helplessly to the flower petals that you had gathered in your hands. You knew the Hanahaki disease existed but, you weren’t expecting yourself to have it. It was the knock to your door that snapped you out of your train of thoughts. You quickly threw the petals inside the bin, wiped off the blood on the floor and tried to make yourself look decent.

“Who is it?”

“Honey? It’s me.” You choke back a sob, taking in a deep breath before unlocking the doors to it. “Honey? Lee Know Hyung told me that you were suppose to meet me at the training room but, it’s been almost 6 hours, what have you be—,”

There was a moment of silence as you stared at the shorter rapper in front of you. Your heart screamed in agony, your fist curled up, ready to throw a punch to him but, you didn’t.

“You look awful,” JiSung took a step into the room, leading your frail into the light. He realise how awfully pale you were and you felt cold, almost too cold for a human. “Did you catch a virus? Honey?”

“Han JiSung, let’s break up.” You managed to croak out despite the dryness of your throat. JiSung paused, staring at you.

“Okay.” He finally said after what seems to be minutes of silence, “but, I hope we can still at least be friends.” JiSung threw himself to you, burying his face into your chest. You didn’t hug him back, neither did you do anything. You just stood there, eyes watching the rapper. “Thank you for the four years.” And he left.

You felt a few tears rolling down your cheek and you fell to your knees. You feel the need to cry, you feel the need to scream, you feel the need to trash around but, you stayed where you were, numbed as ever.

**********

You forced a smile as you watch JiSung and Lee Know cling onto each other on stage. You were the host of the show, congratulating SKZ for winning an award for the best performance. You watched as Chris said his thank you speech before passing the mic over to your ex. JiSung cleared his throat, giving a small smile and nod to you.

“Hi Stays! Thank you for always being here for us and thank you for the votes! Thank you for existing in our life! Before we do our encore, there is something that I would like to confess. M/N and I are no longer together. Thank you for all of you who has supported us on our four year relationship but, M/N and I decided that we are not meant to be together but, don’t worry, he and I are still mutual friends.” JiSung announced.

You felt the familiar pain in you grew as mixed of responses were given by the audience. You see JiSung walking over to you, holding out his arms and you knew it was to show the world that you guys were still mutual friends. You forced another grin, hugging JiSung for a split second before you signal for the music to be turned on. SKZ continued with their encore stage and you, ran backstage, almost broke a door down to the washroom.

Your gut was knotted tighter than a hangman’s noose round the neck of a 300-pound wrestler. You released your content into the toilet bowl. The vomit pooled in it, as you heaved on all fours. Your stomach clenched in pain. More and more petals, just like every other day pooled in the bowl. You wanted nothing more but, death.

*******

Han JiSung was conflicted. Unable to determine what he was actually feeling. There was no immediate reaction to when M/N had asked him for a break up. He wasn’t completely sad, he felt more of relieve because as if god could read his mind, at least, M/N was the one who asked for a break up and he didn’t need to brutally hurt the soloist by confessing that he felt out of love, or that was what he assumed.

It was a month prior to their break up when JiSung realise he was getting attracted by his own group mate, Lee Know. Lee Know had always been kind and caring and sweet hearted when it came to him and it made JiSung realise that he was falling for the dancer. Not that his current boyfriend, now Ex, M/N, was bad or awful. Instead, M/N had been with him for 4 years and he had to admit, the relationship had thought him so much in life. He loved, no, he love M/N still but, maybe he love Lee Know more.

Even though he was confuse about the sudden break up, JiSung decided not to make a big fuss out of it and mutually ends things with M/N. It was not like they were going to cut ties with each other, at least they still kept in touch, or that was what JiSung hoped. After the day he ended their 4 years relationship, he could feel the distant M/N tried to make. M/N barely hangs out in their dorm, M/N actually lives there, now sharing a room with Chris after they announced their break up and JiSung shared a room with Lee Know.

JiSung would catch the soloist in odd morning hours, in the bathroom, sat on the floor, asleep, multiple times and when JiSung asked the latter, he would answer with the same sentence.

“I got too tired so I took a nap here.”

JiSung noticed that within a span of two months, M/N looked like a ghost. He could see how much M/N had lost weight, the hollow cheeks, darken eye bags, the lethargic movement of the latter. He couldn’t help but worry. Every time JiSung tried to approached his ex, M/N would dodge him like a bullet and reasoned that he needed to rush to his studio to complete some work. JiSung frowned, feeling a slight ache in his heart and he ranted his thoughts to his current lover.

It was 4 days later, when JiSung got back from the gym with Lee Know and ChangBin trailing behind him. The dorm was in a mess, there was blood on the floor, flower petals drenched in it making the rapper frightened at the sight. ChangBin had called their leader to ask on what had happened. JiSung felt his heart pound against his chest, unable to calm down even with Lee Know holding him in his arms, something was not right. ChangBin gasped through the phone, looking towards the couple. JiSung could see ChangBin’s hand trembling as he held his phone.

“M/N is in the hospital.”

JiSung sobbed uncontrollably as Lee Know held him. Everyone was outside the Ward, not allowed to enter as per the doctor’s instructions. They were only been briefed that M/N had been terminally ill for the last two months and he was now, on his deathbed. It took a while for all of them to process everything and JiSung was the first to break down indefinitely. His cries echoed down the hallway, he fell on his knees, sobbing M/N’s name.

“Hey, Sungie~,” the tender gentle voice caught JiSung’s attention, “M/N called for you, alone.” Lee Know said.

JiSung didn’t even spare a second to calm down as he barged into the Ward to see his ex, looking so fragile, laying on the bed. There was a heart monitor connected to the soloist, beeping a little too slow for his liking and a oxygen mask on the latter. JiSung, sat on the chair, grabbing M/N’s cold hands and he burst into another wave of tears.

“Hey love, I thought the only time you would cry is when your parents are no longer here. Why are you crying like a baby?” M/N managed to chuckle and teased the rapper in short, gasping breath.

“Why…..why didn’t you tell me that you were ill?”

“This is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you or anyone. Look at you, a crybaby. You looked like a squirrel who had his nuts fall to the ground on a sad winter.”

“M/N…..stop messing around! How are you so carefree?! Wh y didn’t you tell me?! I am your lover, even if I was your lover, I should’ve known!” JiSung sobbed.

“Like how, I should’ve known that you love Lee Know Hyung?”

The question caught JiSung off guard as he looked at M/N smiling face.

“It’s okay. I know. It doesn’t matter anymore. Only your happiness matters the most. As long as Lee Know Hyung can take care of you to the eternity and beyond, I don’t see any wrong in leaving you in his hands.” M/N felt a tear roll down his cheeks as he gently caress JiSung’s knuckles with hiss thumb.

“B…but how?”

“I rather you not know. Anyways, I am really feeling sleepy right now and exhausted. I thought you should be the last person I would see before I fall asleep,” the heart monitor decreased as every second go by.

“Han JiSung, thank you for making me the happiest man on earth. Han JiSung, thank you for being the love of my life. Han JiSung, thank you for being you. Han JiSung, thank you for existing. Han JiSung, thank you for existing.”

JiSung cried hysterically as the heart monitor stopped, M/N’s grip were no longer tight on his hand. He felt his heart clenched and he begin to feel overwhelmed. JiSung fell off the chair, gasping for air as tears rolled down his cheeks. JiSung felt his chest tightened as a series of cough escapes his lips. Something was bound to come out of his throat and as he heaves forward, a white petal flew out.

“Hanahaki”

It was that moment when he realise that M/N was the one he loved most.

[Selective Mute - SKZ Lee Know X M!Reader] [NSFW]

“Babe, this colour or this colour?” M/N looks to his boyfriend who held two different suit. One was grey, the other was white. He gave a light shrug before pointing to the white one. “What about you? What colour would you be wearing?” M/N made his way to the rack and pull out a black suit. “Looks good. Let’s check out, I’m starving and the kids just texted me. Felix made brownies.”

M/N smiled, wrapping an arm around his older boyfriend and gave a chaste kiss to the latter forehead. The couple were preparing for the red carpet of MAMA, attending as a pair for the first time in the two years of their relationship. A week prior, with the approval of JYP, Lee Know came out to his fans, to the world about being a gay and having a boyfriend. He explained that they had been together for two years. Instantly, the news blew up and thankfully, the outcome was positive. MAMA even invited M/N as a guest to attend with Lee Know.

“We’re homed!” Lee Know voice echoed through the hallways of the entrance as he took off his shoes, putting them neatly on the rack. M/N followed through the older, heading inside the living room.

“Welcome back!”

“Hi Hyung”

“Hey M/N,”

The chorus of response ignited in the kitchen where SKZ joyfully prepared dinner as a team. It was half an hour later when all of them sat at the dining table, devouring their home cooked meal, which was a once in a blue moon thing considering how busy they were and all they ever ate was take out when the leader begins to converse in small talks

“Have you picked out the suit?” Bang Chan asked the couple who sat opposite him.

“Yeah we did. I can’t believe it’s happening tomorrow night.” Lee Know said. M/N gave him a squeeze on his thigh, calming the older down.

“It’s finally time. STAYs love you guys as much as they love all of us so everything will be alright.” ChangBin assured the dancer just as he got up to take a drink from the fridge.

M/N watched fondly as Lee Know started ranting out about how nervous he was whilst the rest of the members assured him calmly. It was a beautiful scene to watch, having them showing support to each other. Unfortunately, by the end of the day, closing to midnight, M/N waved goodbye to the members, getting himself ready to leave the dorm.

“I’m going to see you tomorrow afternoon right?” Lee Know frowned as he look up to his taller boyfriend, hands intertwined behind his neck. M/N smiled softly, planting a soft kiss to the latter’s forehead. “Can you not go home tonight? You can just sleep over.”

M/N shook his head, apologising through his eyes. Lee Know knew he couldn’t get M/N to stay for the night, at least, tonight because M/N had to prepare for tomorrow and he had work to be completed the next morning. M/N is a composer in HYBE.

“Okay,” Lee Know let out a soft sigh, nodding to the latter. Both of them understood each other. As much as the lovers want to just lock themselves in a room and forget the world exist, the world still exist and life had to move in. “I love you.” M/N responded by kissing the older deep enough for the the latter to cry out a soft moan.

Heavy heartedly as Lee Know watch his lover disappear into the closing elevators door, he sighed, going back into the dorm, straight into his room.

“Hyung? Are you okay?” JiSung peeked his head into the dancer’s room, concern on how dejected the other looked. He found Lee Know sat on his bed, knees tugged into his chest as he stroll nonchalantly on his phone. “Hyung?”

“Oh, hey Sungie. What’s up?” Lee Know asked.

“I’m worried about you. I know you’re nervous for tomorrow but, you look as if you are going to attend a death sentence.”

Lee Know frowned even more, “I look that bad?” He sighed, “I know I’m nervous but, I’m more terrified for tomorrow. What if there’s an anti or some kind of sasaeng? I mean, there must be at least one or a couple of people who dislike our relationship. Not that I care about them liking it or not but, what if they hurt M/N?”

“I hear you and I understand where you’re coming from but, you need to know that both of you aren’t alone here. You still have us. We will be there to protect you both and STAYs will be there to protect us. They’re our guardian angels you know.” JiSung said, “have you forgotten when a sasaeng literally snatch Felix’s ÏČË scream randomly out of nowhere? STAYs hunted her down and made sure she was reported. That’s how STAYs are for us.”

“You’re right. I’m getting too worked up for tomorrow.” Lee Know sighed, “thanks Sungie.”

“Always there for you Hyung.” JiSung grinned and gave the older a tight hug.

It was late at night, early in the morning, where neither the Sun or the stars shine in the sky. It was 4am when M/N found himself yawning for the ninth time as he type in the lyrics that he compose an hour ago into his laptop. He was tired but, he was not exactly sleepy. Yawning means coffee. The producer saves his work and took out a can of coffee, gulping it in one shot. He finally took his phone from his back pocket, surprised to see missed calls from none other than his lover. Something was wrong. Lee Know almost never calls, or at least, Lee Know knew when to call considering how little M/N even speak. Locking the door to his studio entrance, sitting back down on his roller chair. M/N called his lover.

“M/N, I——I’m” When Lee Know spoke, it sounded like his voice was made of gravel. His clear tone was undercut with a choking heaviness that forced him to pause several times.

“Give me 15 minutes. I’ll be outside your dorm baby.” M/N was not going to lie at how his heart aches hearing Lee Know’s voice. The last time he heard this voice was almost a year ago when they had a huge fight due to a misunderstanding. It wasn’t pretty but M/N thanked god they manage to talk it out.

His fingers tapped against the elevator walls as he anxiously waited for it to reach a certain level. Every second that went by cause more ache to his heart. He needed to get to Lee Know, fast. Ding! The elevator door opened and M/N sprinted out of it to where SKZ dorm was. There, he crouched, tears streaming down his face as he hiccups, swallowing back sobs that threatened to echo down the hallway.

“Baby.” M/N whispered, scooping his lover into his arms, holding him tightly. Lee Know buried his face into M/N’s chest, letting out a soft sob. “Come on, let’s get you inside, you’re freezing.” The producer lifted the dancer effortlessly. Lee Know has his legs wrapped around M/N’s hips as he buried his face deep into the latter’s neck. Not wanting to wake the rest up, M/N tiptoed towards the room, locking the doors behind him.

M/N gently laid Lee Know on the bed and hovered on top of him, “baby?”

“I’m sorry.” Lee Know sniffled, “you were busy and I just had to disturb you. I don’t even know why I can’t stop crying,”

“Baby, it’s okay. You’re my priority,” M/N gently ran a hand through the dancer’s hair, “now, baby. what’s wrong?”

“I….I just feel so scared for tonight. I.. I know it should be a joyous occasion but, what if, someone hurts you? What if there are anti and sasaeng who wants to hurt you? I’m scared. I don’t want you hurt.” Lee Know sniffled, clenching onto M/N’s black cotton shirt.

M/N cooed and kisses the tears away, booping their noses together, “baby, how could I ever not love you?” The producer grinned, planting a kiss to the dancer’s lips, “everything will be alright, let’s not think negatively. If it’ll make you feel better, I was once a policeman.”

“I forgot about that and I feel so dumb right now,” a blush spread on Lee Know’s cheek as he finally calm down.

“It’s okay baby, thank you for worrying about me. I love you. I love you. I love you.” M/N repeatedly said as he plants kisses to Lee Know’s forehead, down to his eyelids, his nose, his cheeks, his lips, his neck. “May I?” The producer asked for consent, knowing where the kisses were leading to.

“Yes please,” Lee Know whispered as M/N continue to plant kisses on his neck, sucking on them to leave a bruise. The producer continued, sliding his hand under the dancer’s shirt, caressing his torso so lovingly. Lee Know mewled, arching his back in pleasure. It was just a matter of seconds when they got themselves undress.

“I love you baby.” M/N smiled softly to the older, as he insert a lubricated digit into him. Lee Know bit his lips, suppressing a moan, “let me hear you baby.” The producer insert another finger in a scissoring motion.

“Fuck, I want to feel you love, I want you in me.” Lee Know moaned.

M/N chuckled, planting a kiss to the older’s forehead as he added another finger into him, “patience, baby.” Almost like a growl, Lee Know felt the high in him arise, with a arch back, he came. “Cumming only from my finger, baby?”

“V—-voice, your voice,” breathless, Lee Know clawed on M/N’s broad shoulder, “fuck me.”

M/N smirked, “how about a little ‘please fuck me’, baby?”

“Please fuck me. Please fuck me now, make me scream.” Lee Know moaned as he felt M/N slide his dick teasingly on Lee Know’s entrance.

“Safe word?”

“Euphoria.” Lee Know responded instantly.

“I love you.” M/N whispered into the older’s ears before slamming hard into him.

“A—agh, fuck.” He could feel the older’s tremble under him as he kept a consistent pace, feeling the warmth of Lee Know around him. “B—ig big. You’re too big.”

“Am I hurting you?” Concern, M/N stopped his movement, staring into Lee Know’s teary eyes.

Lee Know felt warmth in his heart. It wasn’t the first time they made love, it has been countless of time and yet, M/N never failed to be gentle and caring. In the name of SKZ, Lee Know swore despite the countless time, he could never get use to M/N. M/N was thick and long. Every time the producer thrusted in him, he could feel his guts being rearranged indefinitely.

Lee Know chuckled, holding onto M/N’s cheek, “I’m okay. I promise.”

“I love you.” M/N kissed him deeply before thrusting in rhythmic. “You’re so tight baby. I can never imagine this pleasure from anyone,” M/N growled as he grip Lee Know’s waist, thrusting into him harder. He puts a hand on the older’s lower stomach, smirking when he sees the bulge each time he thrusted.

“A—agh, agh, M/N, I’m gonna cum. Cum in me please,” Lee Know breathlessly moaned. M/N smiled, locking their lips together as he thrusted with a inhumane speed.

“AGH~~~,” The two moaned, riding their highs. Lee Know could feel the warm liquid of M/N in him as he came onto their chest.

“I love you.” M/N said.

“I love you.” Lee Know gasped. “Why…why are you growing bigger in me?”

M/N chuckled, “round two before everyone wakes up?” He glanced over to the clock on the nightstand seeing that it was almost 6am.

“If I can’t walk on the red carpet later, it’s your fault.” Lee Know laughed, “but oh well, round two please.”

~~~~~~

“Did you guys not hear it this morning?”

“I think Hyung brought someone back.”

“He’s cheating on M/N?”

“That’s impossible. Hyung loves M/N to death.”

“But they were fucking and there was another voice, apart from Hyung’s. M/N is mute. I doubt he would make any sound while fucking”

“Maybe we should talk to Lee Know first. Let’s not jump into conclusions.”

In the midst of the chaos between the members of SKZ, leaving Lee Know apart, M/N walked into the kitchen, half asleep. He nodded to the members as a good morning before pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“M/N Hyung.” I.N called out the latter, “when did you arrive here?”

‘This morning.’ M/N wrote on the board hanged on the fridge. The members had put him into consideration in terms of how they wanted to converse.

“This morning? Meaning, you just came back from work?” SeungMin asked, earning a nod from the latter.

All of them shared a look with each other before Bang Chan beckoned to the producer to sit with them. M/N raised an eyebrow confused but nonetheless took a seat.

“I know we shouldn’t be the one saying this but,” ChangBin gulped, debating whether he should say the next sentence in mind.

“Lee Know might have brought back some—,” Bang Chan was cut off when Lee Know came limping into the kitchen, half asleep.

“Morning guys.” The dancer greeted and smiled sleepily to his lover. He too poured himself some coffee before heading over to M/N, casually taking a seat on his lap. He plants a kiss to M/N cheek before snuggling his head into the producer’s neck.

Everyone gave a death stare.

“Do I have blood on me or was the limping too obvious? Why the hell are they death staring me?” Lee Know whispered to his lover. M/N shrugged putting his hand in surrender. “Are you going to kill me or how is this going to work?”

“Hyung.” HyunJin deadpanned.

“Who was in your room this morning?” Felix asked.

Lee Know looked at them confused, “who was in my room? Myself and M/N of course.”

“How can you prove it?”

“Well, I don’t know if M/N is a invisible man but, I am right here sitting on my man’s lap. Literally.” Lee Know emphasised.

Bang Chan sighed as he finally knock on the table to get the attention of others, “okay. I know we aren’t suppose to actually get ourselves into your business but, we heard someone else in your room this morning Lee Know. The person and you were making love. As you know, the walls are not soundproof here.”

Lee Know and M/N looked at each other, the dancer turning red every second.

Chang Bin continued, “and we do not believe that it was M/N because number one, you are way too loud and two, M/N is mute, we doubt he would make a sound.”

Lee Know broke out into a laugh so hard, tears were accumulating in his eyes, “wait wait wait, so you’re telling me that you suspected that I cheated on M/N?”

“Yes!” The members responded simultaneously.

“Omgggg, I would never cheat on M/N. Besides, if did, I would lose literally my life along.” Lee Know giggled.

“See I told you, Hyung would never cheat.” JiSung chimed.

Lee Know calm himself down and wipe away a fallen tear, “my apologies for being too loud but, the other voice you heard was actually M/N. M/N is mute but he’s a selective mute.”

“I can speak, I have a voice.” M/N said as he adjusted Lee Know on his lap, sitting upright. Everyone gasped, eyes widened. “The only person I feel comfortable speaking to is Lee Know Hyung.“

“You did good babe.” Lee Know praised the producer. He knew how much it would take a toll for M/N to speak to others. “It’s not that he is uncomfortable with you guys but, M/N had a rough past with his voice which causes severe anxiety. It’ll take time for him to open up. It took close to three years when we were just friends for him to speak to me.”

“Oh lord, we’re so sorry for assuming such things.”

“Don’t apologise. You guys did nothing wrong, instead we should be the one apologising for the disruption this morning.” Lee Know blushed.

JiSung grinned, “nah, it is good to know that M/N actually can speak. What we’re worried it’s more of, can you walk later? I swear the bed creaking and your scream Hyung was a little over the moon.”

“Oh, that’s not even a full session.” Lee Know cheekily smiled as he kisses M/N’s cheek.

“Ewwwww,” the member cringed at the lovers.

THE SEQUEL !!!! OH MY GOD ITS EVERYTHING I DREAMED OF AND MORE- YOU DID SO WELL ON IT OMFG

ps - is there any name you would like to be called by ? i was going to call you kim, but i didnt want to assume ^^;

I go by the nickname AiXun. you can call me that dear 🤍

[Not all wishes comes true] - [SKZ x M!Reader]

‼️Warning: Character!Death(s), Implied suicidal, Delusional ‼️

You found yourself walking under the rain, soaked from your head to toe. Your cheek throbbed, your arm hurts. You were tripped by a group of thug for god knows why while you were walking and fell straight on your right side. Your clothes were torn from the friction of the fall and you had grazed your arm on the rough surface of the ground. You were cold, you know that you were cold but, you refuse to feel it. Your heart was aching so bad that it was gradually turning numb. You felt nothing. You forced yourself to drag your feet to one destination in mind, the apartment. You wouldn’t call it home. It was just an apartment you rented after you left your family house the moment you turned legal and independent. It had been years that you’ve lived alone in the rented apartment, coming home to no one most of the time. You were just trying to live your life, to survive.

You just came back from the annual dinner with your family and as usual, it didn’t go well, it never did. Yet again, despite having a stable job, an adequate income, your family criticised you for not giving them money but hell, you did. You gave them half your income every month and you were walking by the thread to live in this expensive world. There are days you would go by with just one meal to save money and no one knew. Your family damned you to the ground, leaving you no chance to explain yourself. Being you, all you could afford was to just listen to them and stayed silent again.

“You’re doing it wrong, again!”

“How worthless of a child can you be?”

“You have nothing.”

“Everything single thing that happened in this family, it’s all because of you!”

“You can’t even do anything right!”

You thought they were right because when you think about what had happened in the past, you don’t see any fighting point. Even if you did, what’s the point of telling or showing to them because they will never change. Family sticks together, they said. Bullshit. You never believe in those because all this while, you were trying to be better, you were trying to succeed, to please them, to be someone to them. It wasn’t just your family that had always been an ache to your heart. Your job was demanding. You took up two job to support yourself and most of the time, you run on little to no sleep for days and on your off days, you usually sleep it off. You barely had a life to begin with. Your social life was a no go too. You barely had any.

You found yourself outside of your apartment, rummaging through your pocket for your keys. You were sure the landlord was going to give you a hell of a scolding with the puddle of mess you left trailing from the elevator to your apartment probably tomorrow. You finally found the keys and unlock the door, surprise to see shoes neatly aligned in front of the entrance. The apartment lights were switched on and it sounded chaotic. Chaotic? Why? You close the door behind you, slamming it lightly to alert whoever was in the apartment. You didn’t mind if it was a robber because just maybe the robber would shoot you in the head to escape and then you would just die. You were that tired that wanting to die was possibly the only thing that would excite you. You stood at the entrance, creating a new puddle on the floor as you again, rummage in your pocket, for cigarettes this time. If you were going to die, a last smoke wouldn’t hurt. You lit up a cigarette.

“Bab——y?” You looked up to see Lee MinHo, Lee Know, and your eyes widened, the lit cigarette slips out from your fingers.

“Hyung, what are you waiting for? Get him in.” Another voice, this time, Han JiSung appeared beside MinHo and your eyes meet.

“Seriously, you guys. Why are you staring at the door?” Lee YongBok, Felix, came in the picture. He gasped.

“Is M/N back? What’s the hold up?” Christopher Bang, Chan, walked over to the three of them and when he finally turn to see you at the door, he shouted. “M/N?! What happened?!” He was first to came to your aid. He cups your face tenderly, inspecting it like a detective. You almost sigh at how warm his hands were. “Sweetie? Baby? What happened?”

“I…..” You didn’t realise how dry your throat was, “I fell.”

“Oh my god! Someone please get a first aid kit.”

As if time had started moving, you watch as MinHo, JiSung and Felix scrambled back into the apartment and Chan helped you out of your ruined shoes. You were practically lifted into Chan’s arm and set on the floor of the living room. You didn’t have a couch by the way. Felix had stripped you off your soaked clothes and JiSung threw a bunch of towels he could find on you. You were butt naked under the bundle of towels that covered your frail. LeeKnow came running, tripping over his own foot but somehow manage to land in front of you with a first aid kit. You were overwhelmed with the four men panicking in front of you.

“Baby? Tell me if it hurts okay?” LeeKnow whispered as he cleans your bruises and cuts with the iodine. You only nodded, knowing that you couldn’t feel anything. You didn’t know what you should be feeling.

You close your eyes, embracing the fact that the four men surrounded you, warmed you up.

“Hey! We’re back!”

“Why is it so quiet?”

“Probably sleeping, i guess.”

“Do you think M/N Hyung is back?”

Four more voices rang through your ears. Your eyes drifted to the entrance and there they were. Seo ChangBin, Hwang HyunJin, Kim SeungMin, Yang JeongIn. They froze on their tracks when they see you.

“Hyung!”

“Jagiya!”

“My love!”

“Sweetie!”

They came running in front of you, pushing the other four out of the way and you chuckled. You couldn’t believe yourself but you actually chuckled heartedly seeing how the 8 men were somehow pushing one another to be in front of you or generally near you. At first, a chuckle from your lips, a mere hint of amusement. The laughter grew, taking on a manic edge as it bubbled up from deep within your chest. You felt your heart pound gradually, you didn’t like it. You didn’t like the fact that you were starting to feel all your emotions breaking through the numb facade. As your laughter reached a fever pitch, it abruptly died away, leaving a deafening silence. Tears streamed down your face unchecked, mixing with the remnants of your laughter as you crumpled and SeungMin catching your frail midway. Your body wracked with sobs. Every emotion fell through the cries and you just sob your heart out.

They are here. All eight of them are here. Your boyfriends were right in front of you, worried for you. How could you have forgotten about them? You had eight boyfriends, a massive polyamory family that had been together since 4 years ago. You had idol boyfriends that cared and loved you unconditionally despite the limited amount of time that you meet.

“Tired,” you croaked through your hysterical cries, “I’m so tired! I’m so tired of everything!”

“Let it out jagiya, let it out,” you heard SeungMin whispers and you fall into his chest.

“I’m so tired! I couldn’t feel. I felt numb. Why do you guys love me still? I’m a wreck, I’m a fxcked up! I’m so fxcking worthless! I genuinely forgot about your existence today. I was ready to die and all of you…..” you trail off, feeling your throat closing up, “you guys are here loving me still.”

“Forever and always till infinity and beyond, we promised.” ChangBin said.

“Forever and always till infinity and beyond, we promised.” You repeated feeling all the weight that bare you down being lifted indefinitely.

You met Stray Kids years ago when you had just left the family house. You were on shift at the cafe and they came in for a midnight snack. JeongIn was the first to talk to you and he introduced you to the rest of the group. You began hanging out with them occasionally and gradually, you learnt about each others. You learnt about their hardships and they learnt yours. In a nutshell, you guys knew each other so well that you can become the other person. Soon, you fell in love with each of them and you confessed openly. SKZ was taken aback but, they worked things out and all of you came into conclusion in a polyamory relationship. You certainly didn’t expect it to work but, it did. In a blink of an eye, you have been with them for 4 years now.

“Are you okay to tell us what happened?” HyunJin asked softly as he assuringly squeeze your thigh.

You nodded, “maybe after i put on some clothes?”

You saw all their worry dissipate and they laughed along. You got dress with the help of HyunJin and then find yourself seated in a circle in the living room. You saw various of food set on the plastic cover, what intrigued you was the birthday cake in the middle of it.

“Cake?” You questioned to yourself and your brain begin doing the math if you had forgotten anyone’s celebration today. “I….I’m sorry. Did i forget anyone’s birthday or anniversary today?”

“Baby,” JiSung pouts beside you, “It’s your birthday.”

“It is?” Your eyes widened as you look at the calendar on the wall. Shit. It is your birthday. How could you have forgot? Even your family didn’t say anything earlier on. You smiled bitterly as you shudder from the thought of your family. “I forgot I’m old.” You chuckled.

“My love,” I.N tenderly kisses you on the cheek, holding your hand firmly.

You smiled sheepishly and gulped down a cup of iced tea. You felt everyone’s eyes on you and you sighed, fishing for the right words to tell them what had happened, “but I’m okay now. Thanks to you guys.”

“Sweetie, we know that we’ve been very busy with comebacks and we’ve barely been contacting each other but,” Chan said.

“We’re still your boyfriend, if you ever feel overwhelmed, please call us. We’ll be here.” LeeKnow continued.

“If you were anything in this world, you’re our priority.” ChangBin declared.

“You will always and will be our priority.” HyunJin affirmed.

“You’re doing so well. The world is tough but you’ve persevered through this.” JiSung smiled.

“You’re stronger than every one of us.” Felix said.

“You smile the brightest.” SeungMin added.

“And you don’t have to bear everything on yourself. You have us.” I.N grinned.

“Forever and always till infinity and beyond, we promised.” You felt your cheeks flush when all of them said simultaneously.

“Now, why don’t you make a wish?” LeeKnow lighted the candles on the cake.

You close your eyes, hands clasped over your chest and you whispered, “I wish that what we have right now will stay within us forever. I really love all of you so much.” You took a deep breath and blow out the candles.

Little did you know, you reopen your eyes to the dark living room, seated in your drenched and soaked clothes. The bruises and cuts from earlier unattended. Tears stream down your cheeks silently as soft sobs left your lips. SKZ weren’t here. They never were, not after you lost them in an accident months ago.

Not all wishes come true.

[New Year Kiss - SKZ Seo ChangBin X M!Reader]

M/N was not exactly the typical ‘perfect’ guy they said. In this world, we are living, it may be true that society was finally being open to a world of acceptance but, it was not yet for M/N. Honestly, if anyone would describe M/N at first look, M/N will be called as a delinquent. Not because of what he had done but, only because of how he looked.

Despite he looks and all the judgements given by others, there was that one man who stood strong in his life, loving him unconditionally. He was older than the latter, famous and adorable. If M/N could write a book about this man. He would produce a series of book for the latter. His name is Seo ChangBin.

Seo ChangBin was known as a member of stray kids. He was one of the talented producer better known in 3RACHA. ChangBin was known to be the muscular man, no doubt, the pulsing veins of the rapper whenever he worked or the huge muscle of his biceps, almost as thick as I.N’s face if one could compare it.

The two met at a new year party, where SKZ was invited as guests. M/N happened to be the best friend of the host. It was chaotic. M/N was just sitting by the bar, a cocktail in his hands when he noticed the rapper being pushed by the drunk dancers. Like a knight in a shining armor, M/N rescued ChangBin. He pulled the rapper up in his arm in a bridal way, did not even give him to say anything and walked away from the drunken.

“I…you… thank you.” ChangBin turned red tomato, stammering for to the younger. At first, M/N stared at the rapper, scan their surrounding before giving the latter a genuine small smile.

“You’re most welcome, Dwaekki right?” A chuckle left his lips and ChangBin felt his heart skip a beat.

“ChangBin, Seo ChangBin.” The rapper introduced himself. “Do I really look like a Dwaekki?”

“An adorable.” M/N beamed. “I doubt you should be away from your members. Where are they?”

“I just came back from the bathroom but, I seem to lost them.” ChangBin reasoned.

M/N looked through the crowd, squinting his eyes slightly. “I’m going to assume that one of your members has a blond hair wearing a rabbit ears headband.”

“Yes. That must be Lee Know.”

“If you walk just along the pathway behind the buffet, it’ll lead you to where they are.” M/N said.

“Well, I better get going then.”

“Hold on,” M/N called out, “if you don’t mind, can I get your number? I want to bring you out on a date.” Despite the boldness of him, ChangBin could see the clear redness spread on his cheek.

“Sure, of course.” The two switched their phone to let themself enter their numbers. “M/N. F/N M/N, that’s a really nice name. I hope to see you soon.”

“Very likely Dwaekki.” M/N grinned.

“10! 9! 8!” The crowd begin to cheer.

In the midst of the ruckus, M/N found the courage to hold the rapper waist, “Dwaekki, if you’re okay. May you do the honour to being my new year first kiss?”

ChangBin was taken aback slightly but, nonetheless, the moment the crowd erupted with a ‘HAPPY NEW YEAR!’, the rapper pulled M/N by his collar, linking their lips together.

And the love story begins.

A/N: Credits to ODDinary for the picture.

need LONG buddie fics i mean like 50k plus

[Jealousy - SKZ Lee Felix x Male Reader] [NSFW]

“Ah, Hyung. You have to stop it.” Yang JeongIn whined as he leaned against the older, breathing heavily.

“What? I didn’t do anything. I was simply just poking your waist.” F/N M/N, smiled innocently as if he hasn’t been tickling the soul out of the maknae.

“You’ve been tickling me and you know how ticklish I am.” I.N rolled his eyes. “Ah I’m tired. Let me sleep on you.”

It was an off day, a very rare day for SKZ and they were all in the dorm, enjoying their off day. They had invited M/N, a close friend of them and a trainee in the company. No doubt, being in a survival show together had made their bond so strong.

“I want ice-cream.” M/N suddenly said, catching the attention of the three others, ChangBin, Jisung and Felix that sat together with them in the living room.

“There’s some in the fridge, I’ll get them.” I.N stood up, walking into the kitchen.

“Thanks Innie, I love you.” M/N chimed, blowing a kiss to the maknae.

Oh, little did he know, that was a wrong thing to do. The next thing he saw was Felix tossing the controller towards him and stomp off.

“Ooohhhhh, someone’s jealous.” ChangBin sings.

“Get your boyfriend before you get your ass whooped.” Jisung added.

M/N rolled his eyes, “hey, I’m the dominant one so he’ll get his ass whipped instead. Why is jealous over his own bandmates?”

ChangBin chuckled, “you sure bout that bro? So you’re admitting that you won’t be jealous if,” he paused, getting up, “I go into his room and comfort him and maybe, fuck the soul out of him?”

Almost in a snap of a finger, M/N had ran down the hallway, barging into Felix’s room, “babe.”

Felix was sat on his bed, knees tugged under his arm as he scroll on his phone. He didn’t seem to pay attention as the older walked into his room.

“Baby, I’m sorry.”

“Hmmm,” was the only response M/N got from the younger.

“Baby, you know there’s nothing between us. I’m just bonding with the maknae.”

“Then, date him instead.” Felix scowled. He looked at older, eyes fired in jealousy, “you must’ve love him so much.” He sarcastically retorted.

“Baby, of course I do,” M/N said as he approached the younger, “I love everyone in stray kids like my own brothers but, I love you so much more. Forever and always right? Infinity and beyond?” He took a seat beside the younger, caressing his shoulder.

Felix shudders to the touch, it was his soft spot. Everything about M/N is his soft stop. From the way he talks, having a deeper voice than himself, to the way he always manage to get him weak on the knees with his soft, tendering touches.

“Do you swear with your life that you only love me in the romantic kind of way?” Felix pouts, holding out his pinky finger.

“Forever and always, remember? How did I end with the most cutest, lovable boyfriend?” M/N chuckled, intertwining his pinky finger with Felix’s.

“Forever and always.” Felix repeated. He grinned, pulling the older into a hug and kissed him.

“A little very daring aren’t we?” M/N chuckled once they broke out of the kiss.

“I’ll be the daring one today and this is your punishment for making me jealous.” Felix pushed the older onto the bed, stripping him off his shirt.

“Lee Felix, what are you doing?”

Felix smirked, “what do you think I’m doing? And call me baby. I’m not Lee Felix now.”

“B—baby.” M/N stammered shyly.

“Yes daddy?” Felix smiled innocently as he untied the knot of the older sweatpants. “Fuck, I miss Daddy so much.”

“L—-let me help you.”

“Oh no daddy. Neither are you allowed to touch yourself nor touch me. That’s your punishment. Hands above your head daddy.” Felix grabbed M/N’s hand, tying them with god knows how a tie appeared on his bed. “Fuck, I can never get use to how big you are daddy.”

M/N watched intensely as Felix stripped whilst straddling on top of him. He knew he was growing hard and it was suffocating. The younger took him in his hand, stroking him painfully slow and tenderly.

“I’m gonna cum if you keep doing that.” M/N let out a breathless moan.

Felix smiled, “you’re not allowed to cum daddy. Only I will tell you when to cum,” Felix engulfed the other into his mouth, bobbing his head in a steady rhythm. “I can’t wait for you to be inside me.” He poured a generous amount of lube onto the older.

“Baby,” M/N moaned, “you have to prepped yourself, it’ll hurt you.”

“No matter how many time I prepped myself, I’m never used to your size daddy. You’re so huge every time,” Felix groaned, slowly inserting himself onto the older. “A—-Ah, so big.” The younger moaned once he finally succeeded to fully sit onto the older. “You can see the bulge daddy.” He cried touching the spot where a visible bulge could be seen.

“Babyyy, you’re so hot.” M/N moaned.

“You’re so deep daddy.” Felix begins bouncing himself. The two rode their highs in a steady pace. Felix had to hold the older hips down from thrusting upwards into him. “I’m gonna cum daddy.”

“Me too baby.”

“Cum inside me.” Felix whispered as he connects their lips together. “Aa—-ah,” he screamed as he came, the older followed through, releasing inside of him. He fell on top of the older.

“That was euphoria.” M/N breathed as he hugs the younger tightly. “I should get you jealous more.”

“No,” Felix groaned, “that was suppose to be a punishment and how did you even release yourself from the tie.”

“Actually, I released myself right after you tied me. It wasn’t that tight anyway but, you were.” The older winked making a blushing mess out of the younger. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.”

“No…, let’s stay this way for awhile more.”

“I’m inside of you baby.”

“I know.” Felix mumbled into his chest, “just awhile more. Let me feel you inside of me.”

M/N chuckled, tightening his hug around the younger, “I love you baby. Forever and always.”

“Forever and always.” Felix smiled.

“Hyung, the ice cr——-AHHHHHH MY EYES!” I.N who went into the room immediately ran back out, slamming the door shut. “CHANGBIN HYUNG. YOU SAID THEY WERE SLEEPING.”

“They are sleeping with each other. Not my fault you’re too innocent.”

M/N could hear ChangBin laughing at the youngest.

a story about a god and his soulmate

Full story is 40+ pgs long and free to read on my itch.io!

[Promises; Part Three] - [Jujutsu Kaisen! Nanami Kento x M!Reader] [NSFW]

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

M/N was on the beach, nestled in the hammock with Nanami. His eyes are closed as he relish in the sounds of the rushing waves and the gulls squawking in the air. He turn over, resting his head on Nanami’s chest. Nanami adjusts his arms so he can hold M/N while still reading his book. M/N’s eyes open a little, and he shields them from the sun.

“You’re staring.” Nanami said as he finally puts down the book he was reading aside. “Is there something on my face?”

M/N chuckled and nuzzles his head like a dog cuddling his owner, “handsomeness. Too much handsomeness on your face, I don’t want anyone to see you ever again.” Nanami could his cheek burning up as he runs a hand through M/N locks. “I can’t believe you’re here with me Kento-san.”

"I’m here. I’m right here with you."

That was all it took for M/N. M/N smirked as he lifted Nanami's frail single-handedly earning a yelp from the other. Nanami was quick to hold on tight as M/N brought them to their bedroom, tossing the older onto the bed.

"How are you still strong with only one arm?"

"I've been working out." M/N shrugged, “There isn't exactly anything I could've done alone in this house so working out was a go-to for me. Now, if I may, l've been holding back for 6 years, don't expect to walk for the entire week, Kento-san."

Nanami blushed as M/N climbed into the bed, crawling over to the older, "M/N, let me do the work."

"Oh, I would like that." Nanami got up and push M/N to lay on the bed. He straddled M/N's lap, seductively removing his shirt. "Damn, you're so sexy baby." M/N couldn't keep his hand to himself as he trail along Nanami's collarbone down to his nipple, pinching it lightly.

"Agh." Nanami moaned subconsciously grinding his hard on to M/N's. "M…M/N,"

"Baby, If you keep being so cute, I really can't hold it back any longer." M/N groaned. He had unbutton Nanami's pants and helped the other to take it off with his underwear. *Lube, we need lube."

"N...o, it'll take too long. F...aster M/N,* Nanami whimpered as he took M/N's finger into his mouth, sucking on it.

That's it, you're too cute for me." M/N flipped them around so he would hover on top of the older. He gently pushed a finger into Nanami's entrance earning a cry from him. *Are you okay?"

"*Y...eah, your fingers are so long, it's hitting me so deep."

Nanami breathed.

"Good to know baby"" M/N grinned. He continuously pump his finger into Nanami. The older couldn't hold back his cry of pleasure as M/N found his prostate, abusing it rapidly.

"I'm gonna fuck you so hard baby."

"Agh! Too...too much," Nanami arched his back, cumming onto his stomach.

"Cumming from just my fingers" M/N runs a hand through his (h/c) locks, groaning at the irresistible sight. He took his dick, stroking them slow and strong, positioning in front of Nanami's entrance. "I'm going in."

"Agh," Nanami moaned, his fingers dugged into M/N's shoulders. M/N couldn't be bothered that they did sting.

"S..slower."

"Sorry baby. You need to relax or you're gonna literally break my dick into half." M/N gripped onto Nanami's waist and push himself further in, Nanami screamed when he had fully entered. "you good?" M/N leaned down to kiss the fallen tears on Nanami's cheek, "we can stop here."

Nanami moaned and shook his head, "just, give me a minute. I just need to adjust to your size. You aren't exactly small. You're monstrous." M/N laughed seeing the older whimpers.

“I’m going to start moving Kento-san.” M/N whispered into the blonde’s ear, his teeth grazing over the tip of his ears playfully. Nanami could feel his stomach being rearranged indefinitely. M/N was filling him up with every slow and gentle trust. Whimpers of pleasure escapes the blonde’s lips as M/N gradually fasten his pace. “Fuck, you feel so good Kento-san,” M/N groaned , his head thrown back in pleasure.

"Kiss me M/N, kiss me.” Nanami held out his arms. M/N gladly lets himself into Nanami’s embrace, locking their lips together. They kissed intensely as if tomorrow never exists to begin with. M/N could feel every vibration of Nanami’s moan through their heated kiss and that, was such a turn on for him.

“Shirt, off.” Nanami whispers and for that second, M/N stopped moving, breaking their lips apart. “M/N?” Nanami could see M/N uncomfortable flinch when he slips a hand under M/N shirt, “M/N, what’s wrong? Is something hurting? Baby? Is it the scars?” M/N seemed to give in as he nods mutely, leaning his head onto Nanami's shoulder. "M/N, you're beautiful.* Nanami cupped M/N's face to make eye contact with the younger.

"It's not really about the scars. I don't mind having this scar on me for life. It's just, people. People get scared of me. I don’t want you to be scared of me when you see the scars."

"Oh, fuck them, fuck the people. I’m not those people," Nanami kisses him, "they don't get to judge how MY M/N looks. They don't get to know that the love of my life is wearing a scar that indicates a sacrifice to save me. M/N, I really love you."

M/N couldn't hold back the tears as they stream down his cheek. How long has he not cry his heart out?

"M/N," Nanami moaned, *I don't know why but, you are growing bigger in me. It's hitting me so deep, you're gonna rip me apart."

M/N sniffled, "sorry baby. I really can't hold back this time. I mean it"

Without any warning, M/N pulled back and slammed into Nanami with an indecent strength. He could hear the cries from the older to slow down, or at least, be gentle but, M/N couldn't get himself to. Not when Nanami declared that he was his. Nanami was his and he was Nanami's.

"SL…..OW D…OWN! M/N…..agh, I...agh,.. I'm cumming." Nanami's legs wrapped around M/N's as it spasm. M/N came in the older as the older spurted on their stomach.

"Kento-san, I really love you." M/N linked their lips.

"I know. I really love you more." Nanami smiled.

“As i said, i will make sure you don’t get to walk for the next week, I’m only getting started Kento-san.” M/N smirked as he literally rips his shirt single-handedly. Nanami couldn’t help but blush furiously seeing how hot his lover is.

Let’s just say, Nanami was indeed bedridden for the entire week.

********************************************

Authors Note!

Credits to @actuallysaiyan for letting me use his imagine to start off the story. It was a perfect setting!

love is the most twisted curse of all

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