if you've never engaged with a creative art on a regular basis you need to understand that it requires concerted effort to get into "the groove" to make something and every second that it takes to get into that groove causes physical pain, but the only thing worse than doing it is not doing it.
I just want to keep this in my pocket :)
Why do you ship billford? i want to hear all ur handcanons and reasons hehehe
ALL of them? My friend I do not think you comprehend the magnitude of the task you have requested. I can tell you some of them.
Here's a post I already wrote listing why I like them, and here's a post about what Ford thinks about Bill, and I just made a post about what Bill thinks about Ford because I've had it typed up on discord for ages and decided it needs its own post.
So, some headcanons:
⭐️ While most people who ship it headcanon that they had a romantic relationship of some kind pre-betrayal, my default headcanon is that they DIDN'T have a relationship—mainly because I enjoy making Bill, specifically, miserable, and I like headcanoning that Ford violently lost interest in Bill at the EXACT moment Bill developed a sincere interest in Ford.
Meaning that Bill "LOOKS LIKE MR. BRAINIAC FINALLY GOT SMART" Cipher destroyed his own chances five seconds before going "no no wait I actually want to keep this one," and that's SO funny. I made a graph!
⭐️ From Lost Legends we know that Ford used to date a siren. In the original Greek mythology, sirens didn't woo sailors by singing prettily; sirens offered knowledge about distant and future events. Sailors wrecked their ship upon the sirens' shores and starved to death at their feet just to listen to them sing about the secrets of the universe.
What I'm saying is: Ford has a type.
⭐️ This is a mutual monsterfucker 4 monsterfucker relationship. They look at each other and go "wow you're such a weird-looking alien" and they're attracted to each other BECAUSE of that, not in spite of that. I don't want any of this "oh how could I be drawn to something so strange..." shame out of Ford, as far as I'm concerned his first crush was Mothra, a floating triangle is nothing.
⭐️ Consequently, this means that if you take an AU where Bill gets stuffed in a human body, rather than making things easier, it ironically means that any PHYSICAL attraction Ford had for Bill instantly evaporates. A humanized Bill could be the sexiest damn thing in the room and everyone else in the vicinity is going 🥵💦 but Ford's going 😐. If they hook up with Bill in a human body it's in spite of Bill's current appearance and it's because Ford knows that, underneath the body, Bill's still Bill. You could hand Ford a perfect Tumblr Sexyman supermodel and he'll be fantasizing about a three-tiered pyramid with more teeth than a shark.
⭐️ Bill WILL play Dungeons Dungeons & More Dungeons with Ford, voluntarily, for fun. However he always wants to DM and he's brutal.
⭐️ I think that the majority of the Henchmaniacs used to be like Ford: young, naive, USEFUL aliens that Bill was trying to manipulate into getting access to their universes, probably by trying to get THEM to build portals. None succeeded, but they got far enough along that either they chose to join Bill, they were forced to flee their dimension and join Bill—or, due to Bill, their home no longer existed, so they might as well join him. I think that every one of them was once his ✨favorite✨ person. I think he sealed the deal in winning their friendship & loyalty with a calculated, scripted display of vulnerability—the exact same one he tried to use on Ford: I liberated my constricting, flat world; I want to liberate yours...
He may have dated some of them, too, especially right after they joined. Because he wouldn't have recruited them unless he thought they were JUST ♥ LIKE ♥ HIM. They're special, they're important...
... and after a few years, Bill realizes they're not that much like him after all and loses interest, and they sink down into the rank-and-file with the rest of the Henchmaniacs. The Henchmaniacs are FULL of people who were once Bill's Favorite—his best friends, his confidants, his lovers—and most of them are desperate to catch his eye and be that important to him again. They gave everything they had to Bill only for Bill to get bored.
So when he shows off the human who enabled Weirdmageddon and invites him to join the gang, they know EXACTLY what they're looking at: Bill's newest favorite. They know how this goes, he'll be gaga over this earthling for the next 5 to 500 years and then Ford will be just another regular Henchmaniac. The fact that Ford doesn't seem eager to join is no problem. Ford isn't the only soon-to-be Henchmaniac whose world Bill ended; some of them had to be talked around into joining, too.
⭐️ I think that, if you took Bill with his canon personality, didn't give him any character development, and then made him GENUINELY fall in love with Ford, and had him SINCERELY try his hardest to be a good, loving, healthy partner... he would still be toxic as hell for Ford.
Part of what draws Bill to Ford is that he sees SO much of himself in Ford—some accurate, some just projection. (You who crave power and fame and fortune like I do; you who also hunger to be all-knowing; you who would also sacrifice your world and your family and everyone you know and love to get what you want; you with an ego the size of the moon, oh, you deserve an ego the size of a star.) And so he assumes that what Ford really wants is what BILL would want in Ford's shoes.
And if Bill was Ford, what he'd want is to REALLY be the man who changed the world. Bill thinks he's fulfilling all Ford's wildest dreams if he gives that to him. Naming Ford the orchestrator of Weirdmageddon is the most generous gift Bill could ever offer.
Even if Bill is Really Really Trying and accepts that okay Ford doesn't want his world invaded: his idea of showing Ford love will be pulling the strings to get Ford fame & fortune. Teach him secrets of the universe that he can publish in a dozen groundbreaking scientific papers, arrange meetings with politicians and celebrities, get him a Nobel, get him an Oscar-winning bio pic, get him a billion dollars, get him EVERYTHING Ford's ever imagined as a marker of success and then double it.
When Bill's manipulating Ford, he offers praise and approval in little drops periodically leaking from the faucet, to keep Ford thirsty for more. When Bill's LOVING Ford, he just breaks the fire hydrant and lets it flood the street.
But the thing is, that's not good for Ford. That'll never make him truly happy. Ford's only ever learned how to measure his success by external markers, but the more external markers he collects the more he'll feel like he hasn't Made It yet. It's even possible that knowing Bill's helped him get this far will make him feel like he hasn't really EARNED it. He could have the whole world handed to him and he'll feel just as dissatisfied as he was on the day he first summoned Bill.
And Bill, even if he's trying his HARDEST to do this right, wouldn't be able to understand why this isn't working. A trillion years old and the only way he knows how to show love (or to receive love) is by showering someone in praise and gifts and favors. If that doesn't work, he doesn't know what's left.
Messing with files again, I found one thing really interesting thing on Episode 4.
Aparantly, the game had another ending??? Or was supposed to have multiple endings, maybe? Anyway, i found something really interesting, but had to delete that famale conselour of Rachel and find a way to get on the facility without replaying the hole thing.
After that, the normal ending scene starts tho… I really wanted to see an ending with Rachel going after Zack.
Just a doodle
I was inspired by a line from the fic Boy with a Broken Halo by Sasaria
Went ahead and did the horror house version of the site as well.
Gray is a vampire?!
There’s a mysterious haunted house that appears and reappears whenever it pleases. No one knows where it came from –
Within it are the six genuine “monsters” Gray the vampire has gathered.
They seem to have come from a far away town that no one knows about to attend the Nico Nico super convention.
And one day, they came to your city!
The Haunted House
A ghost that does not know whether or not she is alive. For some unknown reason, she’s a Japanese ghost.
A rude werewolf. Unexpectedly, a grown-ass man.
A sorrowful android bearing the burden of not knowing how it is to be loved. He has an eye obsession.
A pumpkin Jack-o’-Lantern. He has a face beneath his mask.
A monster cat who drives a motorcycle…Is she C**woman?!
A vampire who acts as the ringleader. He gives lonely monsters a place of their own.
Story
There’s a mysterious haunted house that appears and reappears whenever it pleases. No one knows where it came from –
Today as usual, the monsters worked hard to scare the humans who came visiting. After the show, a young boy approached them – “I want to become a monster.” How will the six monsters answer him?!
Just gonna go on a tangent about this for a second, because like
Part 1: Why they don't work and never have
The number one piece of advice people get about writing is to give their characters flaws. Your characters can't be too perfect. Flaws will make them interesting, dynamic, compelling, more real! Flawed characters make for a perfect story! But then someone will ask how to give their characters flaws, and the response is almost invariably something along the lines of
"Just don't make them perfect. Give them a scar or a disability or something."
This is some of the worst writing advice I've ever heard, right up there with "NEVER use adjectives ever" and "Nahh, you don't need to make backups of your work, it'll totally be fine and nothing bad will happen." It's also the single most common piece of writing advice I've come across. This is bad advice.
Because like… Scars aren't a personality flaw. Disabilities especially are not a personality flaw. Both these things have their uses in writing characters, but they aren't flaws. Honestly it's a little shocking that people think it's okay to outright say they think a disability is a character flaw to begin with, because like. Excuse me?
The next problem with this is that, even if these were somehow character flaws, most people don't want to make literally all their characters scarred and disabled. That's like saying that good characters are required to have blonde hair and bushy eyebrows. A character or two with those traits isn't an issue, but telling someone all their characters need one or both of these two traits? That's incredibly limiting.
Lastly, it encourages people to think up a character and then tack on the 'flaws' after. It's why we ended up with an era of perfectly smart perfectly beautiful perfectly skilled characters that had a disproportionate amount of angst about some tiny barely noticeable scar on their back. It's how we get characters that are 'clumsy' (in no way that actually matters to the story), or who have the sole flaw of being too perfect.
People made characters they liked, and they liked them exactly that way. Then afterwards, they had to tack on some 'flaw' they didn't actually want to be part of the character. So they of course make that 'flaw' as small and unimportant as possible. To go back to the "all characters must be blonde with bushy eyebrows" comparison, it's the writer trying to work around this unwanted restriction by giving everyone rainbow hair dye and eyebrow trimmers.
So, how do we fix that?
Part 2: How to fix that
… Or one way, anyway. There are infinite ways to solve this problem, most of which start by completely throwing out the standard scar/disability advice. Everyone has their own way to write characters. But just saying "idk, everyone is different, there are lots of ways" is ridiculously unhelpful. So, here's one way to do it that I really like to use personally. You can use it too, if you want.
instead of a flaw, I like to give my characters an Unshakeable Trait.
What is an unshakeable trait? It's the term I like to use for something that will always be true about a character. Something core to them, something that will never leave them for as long as they live. It is, most importantly, not a flaw.
Let's come up with a quick character as an example. Meet Alaric, who always keeps his word. Anything Alaric says he will do, he will do it.
This is Alaric's greatest strength.
Alaric says he will save all the orphans from the burning orphanage. People doubt him, but he does it. He said he was going to do it, so there was nothing that could stop him from doing it.
Alaric says he will catch the thieves hiding in the mountains. Many have tried and failed to do this, but Alaric says he can do it. And thus, Alaric does it.
Alaric says he will move a mountain? He wouldn't say it unless he could and would make it true. We've seen him do amazing things before. We don't know how yet, but we know that mountain is about to move.
One day, Alaric says he will slay the dragon. We know, for certain, that nothing will stop him from slaying that dragon.
… Not even if it turns out the dragon wasn't really bothering anyone.
… Not even if something goes wrong and Alaric ends up without the important tools he'd prepared for this task.
… Not even if the battle is likely to kill his entire party. Not even if killing the dragon will only make way for more dangerous monsters to move in. Not even if his friends beg and plead with him, Alaric you must stop, this is a death sentence to us all!
Alaric said he would do this, and he will.
Because this isn't just Alaric's greatest strength. It's also his greatest weakness.
The hearts of the readers are heavy as they realize what is about to unfold, but they are not surprised. By now they know Alaric and they know who he is. They know the dragon will die, no matter the consequences.
In the battle, the entire town and all the people who once lived in it is burned to the ground. Every last one of Alaric's friends die in battle. When the dragon falls, only Alaric is left alive.
… And that makes for a really interesting story! Gosh darn! That's way more fun than a story where some cool guy just always solves everyone's problems all the time! And now that we've seen the terrible consequences of Alaric's actions, we can take it even further! How exactly does Alaric react to what he's done?
Is he unable to cope with his terrible mistake, and twists himself into something awful trying to justify his actions?
Does he plead with the ashes, begging the charred town for forgiveness he cannot have?
Does he vow to take back what he's done? Drive himself to madness in pursuit of an unobtainable goal, every action an even greater mistake than the last?
Does he grow, and change his ways? Because he absolutely can do that. An unshakeable trait is always there deep down inside a character, but it is possible for them to learn to overcome it. It will be a battle they'll fight every day for the rest of their lives, and it is a battle they will not always win, but it is possible. Filled with regret, there may be a day where Alaric says he will do something… and then consciously makes an incredible effort to avoid doing it, because he realized it would be a mistake. Today, he was able to overcome his weakness. That trait isn't going anywhere though, and tomorrow is still unsure.
That is my favorite way to write a flawed character.
The most fun part is, this unshakeable trait can be anything. It can be that they always finish things very quickly. It can be that they love their friends more than anything else in the universe. It can be that they're always multitasking. It can be their child-like wonder, or their scientific mind, or even something as silly as their love of sweet potatoes. When made central to their character and taken to extremes, absolutely anything can function as this dual greatest strength and greatest weakness.
That being said, this is again just one way to do it. To say this is the only way to write a flawed character brings us back to "but they must all be blonde and have bushy eyebrows." And sometimes? Sometimes you don't even want to write a flawed character. Sometimes you want an invincible Superman, and if that's what you want then go for it!
This is one place you could start if you're feeling lost or unsure, but at the end of the day it's just a tool in your pocket. It's up to you to choose your favorite tools for the job.
Writing should be fun! Write what you love. Write what interests you, most of all.
As I mentioned earlier, there will be spoilers! You can skip this if want to experience the game for yourself. Also, feel free to correct me for any mistakes.
Part 2 ┃ Part 3 ┃ Part 4 ┃ Part 5 ┃ Part 6┃ Part 7 ┃ Part 8 Part 9 ┃Part 10┃ Part 11/Finale
The game starts off with Eddie and his brothers playing hide and seek in the cemetery. The brothers ask him why he doesn’t play hide and seek with them and he simply responds because he has the graves to take care of (what a hard worker he is!). One of the brothers tells him that maintenance is already over and Eddie is having none of it. To him graves come first.
After playful teasing and Eddie asking his brother who’s in the grave, the game takes us to our first save. For some reason it wouldn’t let me save the game, until I read the instructions that is (you have to copy the folder from the disc onto your desktop). The game at this point takes a more sinister/dark tone, the music is a bit creepy here with bird chirping in the background. Little brother tells Eddie that the girl in the grave is a child and that she’s very cute, about the same age as brother George (how many brothers does Eddie have?).
Then we are presented with choices (first decision making, folks). How do you want the grave to be? I chose small and wonderful since the girl is…well a child. Eddie seems to agree with my choice and is happy then proceeds to ask his brother why did the child die. Little brother tells him that she was found dead in the woods and probably fell off a cliff after chasing something, a cute animal maybe? She did love cute things after all according to him anyway.
Eddie and his family seem to be animal lovers and we are then presented with the second choice. He seems to want to decorate the gravestone in the shape of an animal. It gives you three options: Bear, Unicorn, and Wolf. I chose unicorn (don’t fight me on this, guys, it’s a little girl! xD)
They proceed to talk about what she was wearing. A dress with a heart decoration on it perhaps? But when her corpse was found, her whole body was covered in blood. Eddie says the burial dress is plain and he does not like her like that (Eddie why?!)
He wants to keep adding more to the grave. I think this is an option for the burial dress pattern. For this one I chose a flower. Eddie asks if that is too common/plain and little bro replies that it should be different (I went with the wrong answer.) The correct answer is the first option (a shooting star?) correct me if I’m wrong as I am a bit confused with this one.
And with that our unicorn gravestone is complete and little brother seems impressed and happy with it! Eddie replies that it is perfect for the little girl and hopes she will rest well in her new grave. I will end part 1 now. Eddie’s father will make an appearance in part 2.
I do have thoughts on how the situation between Mu and Haruka is being discussed.
I believe it's a bit disingenuous to behave as though Mu didn't know Haruka was getting worse and I just want to lay out why it is I feel that way. To be frank it simply doesn't align with anything we heard from Mu in her second voice drama or the things she was displayed as saying and doing within the Portal Timeline. As I am a petty individual I would say it's a stretch of canon to say she did anything other than what she said she'd do.
Which was nothing but support Haruka in his choice as his friend,
Mu Queen B 13:16
"Isn't it exactly because he's my friend? isn't friendship about letting your friends do the stuff they want?"
Though let's go a bit further back for a second how do we know that Mu was aware Haruka was planning to do something that would end his life? Well because she told us and she told us a good while ago in fact,
Mu Queen B 12:36s,
"Ah, but if you don't forgive me Haruka-kun will die. So, I think it'd be best not to do that." ...! [bell tolls] So you've heard about that nonsense too? "Mhm. Haruka-kun told me."
Literally her saying that last thing should be the nail in the coffin for presenting this situation as something Mu wasn't aware of. Because she was told by Haruka himself that if she was voted Guilty he would do lethal harm to himself. This is the first reason why I believe anyone behaving as though there is any chance Mu did not know Haruka planned to do this is either acting dishonestly or simply has not been paying attention.
Well, Gunsli maybe she knew he planned to harm himself but she didn't know how he was going to do it. Haruka didn't even know himself yet he was still trying to figure it out. That's fair. However, Mu still could have told the other prisoners that Haruka planned to do harm to himself just to be safe if she didn't want him to do that or just told him she didn't want him to do that. I guess that's neither here or there though.
Let's just keep walking down this-
Wow; I literally can't even say this is a road, bridge or anything someone is meant to walk on... What the fuck is this? Alright. This imaginary pathway certain people insist on telling those around them really exists despite it not aligning with anything that has occurred thus far. Yeah, I'll believe for a second this is the case and Mu just didn't know even though Haruka told her he would end his life if she was guilty and she would be the first to know if she was guilty.
Not even touching on the landmine of how Haruka would find out she was guilty to begin with. It was possibly when they were restrained after the verdicts but he implies he knew earlier than that when they're talking in the timeline on his birthday in 2023.
Still forgetting all of that maybe Mu didn't know how Haruka would do it.
She still knew he had the intent to harm himself and what her verdict was to her own admission. Then did nothing to even try to dissuade him from harming himself over the course of the portal timeline,
Trial Three Website Voice Lines
2: "You said you’d forgive me. You told me that you would forgive me! Just changing what you think on a whim, you really are the worst." 4: "What are you going to do about this? Haruka-kun died. Hey, guard. You knew this would happen, right?""
The first time she brought him food she even stated that he had to eat it properly meaning she recognized he was not eating and persisted in telling people she had it handled anyway and that he was fine,
23/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)
Mu: Haruka-kun, I brought your food. Are you still alive? Has any mould started growing? Haruka: ……ah, thank you very much. Mu-san. Sorry, um…… I…… Mu: You shouldn’t just lock yourself in your room all day. You have to eat your food properly. Hm, well…… I do understand why you’re feeling down. It feels bad. The atmosphere recently Haruka: Um, I’m totally fine…… Just a bit, I’m thinking, about how to do it. What to do, what to do, to…… fulfil my promise. For Mu-san’s sake……
So, even the fact that he was not eating properly was something she knew long before any of the other prisoners or even us as the audience knew.
Hell, in this timeline Haruka brings up that he's thinking about how to do it. How to end his own life to keep his promise to her and she says nothing to dissuade him from it. While knowing full and well what he's talking about because again she told us he told her.
"Mhm. Haruka-kun told me."
These are the facts from her own mouth.
This is the sequence of events. I do not believe this is a difficult set of circumstances to follow or look into but they are easy things for people to purposely misconstrue. In a way that I can only consider to be an attempt to make Mu sound more considerate than her actions and own words display her as being.
Hell I know for certain that some overzealous individual is going to get in their feelings and go,
"Well Jackalope said in the trial three commencement notice that Mu has trouble putting her emotions into words. He said 'She doesn’t know where or what her feelings are. She just lacks the skills to put them into words, but a human such as she, is quite complicated.'. Maybe this means Mu really did care about Haruka and just didn't know the proper way to express that or how to handle the situation."
One I'm not arguing against that.
I am however arguing what does that have to do with Haruka dying and the words she did say throughout the entire time he was slowly wasting away in his cell from starvation? Like I don't care about how she's feeling about it now when all is said and done. Because while Haruka was starving himself she was having people praise her for bringing him food she knew he wasn't eating?
Because again the first time she brought the food to him she verbally noted he was not eating properly. So the timeline and again Mu's own statements portray that she was aware Haruka was not eating from the onset.
Yet, continued to tell people things such as,
"I’ve been bringing all his meals to him so he should be fine. Isn’t that great of me?" - [Milgram Portal Timeline-23/07/05 (Mu’s Birthday)] "I’ve been taking his food to him like this every day. Isn’t that great of me?" - [Milgram Portal Timeline- 24/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)]
However a lot of people want to spin it as though Mu went through something just as tragic as what Yuno went through.
That she spent months trying to do right by someone and help them get better just to have them die.
It's a pretty easy story to want to spin for Mu's character. Especially when the parties telling it have a vested interest in ignoring certain information. Simply because they want to see the best in someone to validate themselves regardless of how that someone has consistently behaved.
Even her saying you have to eat has been twisted around to say she was telling him to eat so she was really trying to help him and tell him not to do this through saying that. This was her showing concern for Haruka. When what it is- Is definitive proof that while no one else knew Haruka wasn't eating until they found him starved to death or near starved to death Mu did know.
How could she not have known.
She was bringing him food everyday. She saw him every day. Starvation isn't something that can go unnoticed. People will literally lose weight. They will get thinner. There's no way to starve gracefully. Heck it's not even that difficult to tell when someone isn't eating their food.
Definitely not in Mu's case because again it is something she noted he was not doing on June 22, 2023,
"You have to eat your food properly."
Mu Kusunoki to Haruka Sakurai on June 23, 2023 far long before he starved to death.
Now logistically what could she have done? It's not like she could have forced him to eat. What could she have done outside of saying hey you should eat properly?
Well you see there's this thing called an intervention. There's this thing called telling people there's a problem. There's this thing called when multiple people give someone the opportunity to tell them that something is going wrong and another person needs help far beyond what they can provide doing that.
Something Mu was given chances to do but decided to instead assure people that Haruka was fine and she was taking him his food every day. Stating and implying to them that he's being taken care of and eating properly through her statements. Because she's showing them the food, the plates, and saying this is what she's doing.
Why would they not believe her?
Now there's discussions around the fact that anyone within Milgram could have taken some time to go into Haruka's cell and check on them their selves. However, that takes us back to Mu as well because Futa and Shidou asked Mu if Haruka was alright because she was going there every day and they may not have wanted to barge into Haruka's space. This is just a polite thing to do. Since Mu assured them that he was in fact fine and look he's eating see I just took him this then possibly showed them an eaten plate of food-
What the fuck were they supposed to do? Go,
"LIAR- He's starving himself in there isn't he?!"
Shove Mu to the ground barge into Haruka's room and go,
"Haruka we're here to save you this is an intervention. You will have three meals a day like the rest of us and water. Then we will walk daily and start you on communications counseling because this isn't healthy physically or mentally. Kajiyama grab his legs we're taking him to the dining hall."
And force fed him like Curly is Mouthwashing. No, that would be wild. Just believe her. The fuck why would they not believe her? Fuck I would have believed her too. Like okay I believe you that's your friend. The fuck you gotta lie for. If you say you're taking him food then I believe you and I have other things to do but if this continues I'll go in there to check myself eventually.
At the end of the day she knew Haruka wasn't eating she noted that. All to then not get anyone to intervene or help in any way. In fact she assured people time and time again even after Haruka was probably dead that he was fine.
23/07/05 (Mu’s Birthday)
Futa: Oi, you. Is he ok? He’s not even left his room lately. Mu: You mean Haruka-kun? Hmm. Yeah, probably. I’ve been bringing all his meals to him so he should be fine. Isn’t that great of me? Futa: Hah? Who the hell says that sort of thing about themself. ……ah, no, well, right now I understand a bit. When you’re feeling down, it’s nice to have someone who relies on you and accepts you. The rest of us can’t really understand you from where we’re standing. But well, if you’re Haruka’s “salvation” then I guess it really is great. Mu: Salvation……? I don’t know what you mean. Futa-kun, you don’t sound like yourself. Did you hit your head or something? Oh, wait, you actually did, didn’t you. Ahaha. Ah, putting that aside though, did you know it’s my birthday today?
24/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)
Shidou: ……I’m worried about Sakurai-kun. I haven’t seen him around in a while. You’ve been talking with him, right? Mu: He’s fine. Here, look. I’ve been taking his food to him like this every day. Isn’t that great of me? Shidou: Yes, very. I’m sorry I’ve been leaving it to you to look after him. Usually, that would be the job of us adults, and yet we’re leaving you with the burden. Mu: Don’t worry about it. After all, me and Haruka-kun are friends.
Something that goes straight back to what Mu said she would do in regards to Haruka threatening his own life. Again it's not Mu's fault he's dead I don't consider suicide murder and neither does Milgram. Haruka choose to take himself out and that's a choice I've gotta respect. Nobody forced him to make that threat or follow through on it.
Yet no one stopped him either. Milgram, Es, the audience or Mu. None of those things stopped him from doing that or even attempted to.
Mu's defenders can't have their cake and eat it too. They can't say it's the audience fault for not voting Mu innocent and stopping Haruka because Mu didn't stop Haruka either.
Like Mu said,
Mu Queen B 13:05s
You know about it and you're not trying to stop him? Haruka, that is?
"Haruka-kun says that's what he wants, so there's nothing I can do, right?" But you're calling him your friend.
Yeah Mu, you're right. That's what Haruka wanted to attach his life to and die for. Nothing we could've done about it. Es didn't make him threaten himself. The audience didn't either. We should just respect the choices he made to get himself to that conclusion.
Heck at least he got to choose how he went out. That's more than Shidou and Mahiru got.
The last timeline we see with him even supports this,
24/04/19 (Futa’s Birthday)
Futa: ––Hey, are you really ok with this? If you come with me, there’s a chance you can be saved too…… Haruka. Haruka: Yeah…… I’ve made my mind up. I have, something, that I have to do. Futa: Ah, is that right…… Haruka, you know, you’re an idiot. There’s no way…… that will save you…… Haruka: Yeah, thank you. I’m glad you came to talk to me, Futa. Um, thank you, for being so kind. Really. But, I’m sorry. This is all I’m able to do……
All those times she brought food and she never offered him a way out of that promise. She never said this is how you can get out of this. This is how you can move forward with me too. You're life doesn't have to end here. No the person who did that? Who was it again?
Was it the person that brought meals there everyday. That people are trying to jump through hoops to say couldn't notice someone starving right in front of them. Even though that someone was a person she'd been attached to at the hip prior. She could notice when he wasn't making eye contact or distracted by something,
22/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)
Mu: What’s wrong, Haruka-kun? Did something happen? You shouldn’t look away like that when you’re together with me. Haruka: Ah, s-sorry, Mu-san. Um…… No, it’s nothing. I just, suddenly got a feeling. That something is about to happen. Mu: Isn’t that because it’s your birthday? Or perhaps it’s a sign the guard is about to wake up again soon? Fufufu, I bet they’ll be really surprised at a lot of things. Haruka: That, might be true. But, I want the the guard to see. ……the new, me…….
But not a change in his weight. She's not observant enough to recognize the signs of starvation. Even though she went there every day with food. Alright, sure I believe you.
You know I'm not even mad at Mu because Haruka is dead. I'm mad at Mu because Haruka died for someone who no matter how much I comb through the facts did not give one fuck about him. To the point that the last notable thing Haruka did was not thank Mu for being kind to him didn't even thank her for that once if we're being honest but someone else.
Who even while going through the shit he did and saying he didn't have the luxury to bother being concerned about him. Was the first to ask if he was okay. Was the first to check in with the person he saw as being closest to Haruka to just check if he was alright. Then when the situation persisted went in there himself to check on his own birthday.
Just to be meet with what exactly. I was curious about what Futa saw that made him seem so panicked. Curious about how Haruka had done it. But now we know he went in there and saw a shell of person thin, starved, on the brink of death. Probably not too different from how Mikoto's trial three art looks at this point.
And he pleaded with Haruka to just leave be saved some other way. Like damn sure Amane's religion makes him vegan but at least he's eating. It's something I really can't let go it's not murder of course. Mu didn't kill Haruka with her barehands she didn't even kill him at all. But it's just the idea of going to same place every day with the thing that could save someone's life and knowing they're not taking it. All while again and again assuring people it's fine I'm taking him the thing.
Current fixations: Noel the Mortal Fate, Angels of Death(My AoD obsession will never die)
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