Speak For Yourself. I Like Really Spicy Food!

Welcome to the 13th Amendment...

I was discussing high school proms with a friend, and he said guys wants one of two things in a prom date:

1. A slut who will blow you both going to the prom and coming back.

Or

2. Jennifer Connely in the dance scene from "Labyrinth".

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My wife and I are big fans of Labyrinth and David Bowie. For her birthday a few years ago I got her this:

Labyrinth As The World Falls Down

Note from an older person: we fucked up. I apologize. Please unfuck the world, for your own sake.

They missed such a great opportunity to go with horg.org . Bummer

I sent a letter today - something I haven’t done for years

It’s full of plastic bread clips

It’s for Science

The situation: it's late, I'm tired, but I need to shower. There is a huge selection of hair care products on the bar above the shower door.

The bad news: I just decide to grab anything that says "shampoo". I mean, it's all pretty much the same, right?

The good news: the shampoo smells terrible, but apparently, I'll be free of fleas and ticks for 4 to 6 weeks.

My wife and I are teachers. Because most education deductions were eliminated by Trump's "tax cuts", our taxes went up by $7000...

I've been a teacher for 32 years, and I still have school dreams. Not about teaching, but attending.

School being so traumatic people have anxiety dreams about it for life sure doesn't seem uh. Normal

I'm so glad you said "and". That means you must have done the entire list. I've done several, but not all...

DO NOT INTERACT, if you:

think that the violins are the best part of the orchestra, are from massachusetts, put tupperware in the bottom rack on a dishwasher, solely pee standing up, moved to florida from new jersey/new york/pennsylvania , have gone to disney as an adult, hate mint chocolate chip ice cream, shop at whole foods, put your socks on first and then your shoes (instead of sock, shoe, sock, shoe), hate mayonnaise, like my hero academia, eat your steak medium to well done, go to an ivy league school, hate salt and vinegar chips, dont like the color yellow, have blue eyes, and have EVER eaten at arby’s

Couldn't Marjorie Taylor Greene get in contact with the people with the Jewish Space Lasers to shoot down the Russian planes over Ukraine???