Heyyy A Redraw :)

sometimes you need dialogue tags and don't want to use the same four

Humans are Space Orcs: DON’T EAT THAT!!

So I’ve been obsessed with the whole “Humans Are Space Orcs” thing for a while but I haven’t had an idea to add to it until tonight. I don’t know if this has been done before but here’s what happened: I was texting my brother and he mentioned watching this video of a guy who was eating his leftovers in the styrofoam to-go container. Like, eating it styrofoam and all.

You’re probably like “You idiot don’t eat that!” and my next thought was “What if an alien reacted to that?”

Cause here’s the thing: we’ve all seen the posts of humans eating anything. We consume caffeine by the gallon in the mornings just to stay awake. We eat chocolate by the pound cause it tastes good and lifts our mood (don’t act like you didn’t gorge on that chocolate pie/cake at Thanksgiving. We all know you snuck that third piece when no one was looking.) We consume fruits that have cyanide-filled seeds. Hell pineapple is toxic if it’s unripe but we put it on pizza and salads anyways. It’ll burn our tongue anyways but we still eat it.

So naturally, aliens are in this mode of “Humans can eat just about anything. They come from this major Deathworld; why wouldn’t they eat everything? They already said “Fuck you” to the natural order of predation. Might as well have an appetite to facilitate that.” So just imagine this:

Xa’var shuffled into the mess hall after a long what xis human counterparts would say day. Xa’var had been up since the first shift and was just now getting something to eat. It wasn’t easy, being the liaison for xis’ council and the humans, but it was a job Xa’var took pride in.

Keep reading

pink moon.

When the girls dress like the boys x white tie and tails VIII. Marlene Dietrich understood men’s clothes better than most men. And style wise she was far ahead of her time. In a time in which women were more or less stuck to skirts and dresses, she started raiding the male wardrobe to add to her collection of dresses and gowns. She had her men’s tailors, shirtmakers and cobblers (she frequented quite a few) make her suits, blazers, sports coats, shirts and custom made trousers. But only Knize in Vienna and Eddie Schmidt in Hollywood made her many tails. Fun trivia: Dietrich’s starched shirt cuffs were directly attached with a hidden buttoned fastening in the sleeve of her dress suits. So she wore sleeveless shirts with her tailcoat, that allowed for quick costume changes and slimmer, more feminely cut jacket sleeves. And while costume jewelry was always worn with stage costumes, for Marlene’s favorite white tie and tails, the cuff links were always her own- from Cartier, Van Cleef & Arpels or Trabert & Hoeffer.

get squilfed

does covid fuck up your gag reflex

Hilarious shit right here

IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN HAWKINS