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Defining The Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)

For as long as I can remember, I have felt hyper sensitive not only to the behavior and emotions of other’s but to physical pain and the environment as well. I have always felt too much and often experienced a sense of overwhelm without even knowing where it came from at times. I have experienced the bitter sweetness that so many HSP’S know all too well. Like many HSP’S, I have often felt extremely misunderstood and have experienced difficulty fitting in with society. On the same note, I have witnessed this high level of sensitivity to be one of my greatest attributes. Being highly sensitive has been an absolute blessing in my work in the healing arts in fields such as hospice and massage therapy. The HSP trait has also been an invaluable asset as it has been linked to experiencing a range of emotions, deeply empathizing with others, and facilitating creative expression. If you or someone you know can relate to these traits, you are certainly not alone and may very well be a highly sensitive person.In this post, I would like to briefly note a number of variations describing the highly sensitive person. 

The HSP Defined

Although there are various types of Highly Sensitive people, the following descriptions are examples of ways HSP’s have been described in general:

 Dr Elaine N. Aron, Ph.D, author of The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You, in an article titled What Does It Mean To Be Highly Sensitive? describes the HSP demeanor as a particular trait found in one’s personality. She defines an HSP as a person who responds to mental, physical, and emotional stimulation acutely. She explains that being a highly sensitive person is normal and about 15-20% of the population with a particular gene are considered to be a highly sensitive person. There has also been evidence based research in the field of psychology suggesting the HSP trait is, indeed, a real trait some people truly acquire. This personality trait is called SPS(Sensory Processing Sensitivity), indicating that the HSP actually has neural differences from most of the population. 

In the previously mentioned article, Dr Aron goes on to mention that the HSP has pros and cons. Some of the positive traits included involve traits such as empathy, intuition, being highly attuned to another’s needs, and creativity. Infact, many HSP’s have careers in fields such as therapy, counseling, writing, artistry, and music. Some negative aspects of being an HSP include being easily overwhelmed, tiring easily, and are very sensitive to other’s emotions. She explains more about the scientific research regarding the HSP on her website. 

Another author known for her work in this field is Dr Judith Orloff MD. She has written many books and articles geared to the highly sensitive person and I have personally enjoyed reading her work. In Psychology Today, she mentions that highly sensitive people have a low tolerance for stimulation and a preference for spending time alone. She also mentions the HSP having a sensitivity to sound, light, and smell as well as experiencing a sensitivity to large crowds. Although HSP’s can be extroverts, she mentions that most HSP’s tend to be introverts.    

In this post, I briefly described my experience as an HSP as well as several descriptions of the HSP by experts in the field of Psychology. Since this blog is dedicated to supporting and connecting with other HSP’s or anyone interested in the topic, I intend to create more informative posts as I continue my journey. I believe there is an abundance of knowledge we can all learn from eachother on this journey from surviving to thriving as highly sensitive people. 

With love,

Dahlia

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10 Ways for Highly Sensitive People To Create New Habits That Stick

May 6, 2019

In my last article, I mentioned the importance of consistency when it comes to practicing new behaviors to cope with emotional overwhelm. (The topic of the post).

In this post, I would like to build upon the topic by sharing some ways I have learned to integrate new behaviors or habits in such a way that improves my persistence. As I have learned over time, persistence is key!

Because I have always struggled with persistence and sticking to rigid routines and mundane tasks, I have had to strive for persistence in a number of ways. I have had to learn about the importance of implementing routines (particularly for HSPs) into a daily schedule.

Implementing daily habits and routines for HSPs can be a necessary component to achieving a sense of security and balance in an overwhelming world.

Building routines can be a great way for HSPs to seek comfort and a gain a sense of knowing what to expect in a world where unexpected things happen. It can also help HSPs maintain greater focus on personal goals/dreams when there are multiple distractions arising from multiple sources. I have learned that it can also help avoid procrastination, which can lead to regret and even more feelings overwhelm.

While routines can be an excellent tool to simplify one's life, I know many highly sensitive people can find change overwhelming. I know from experience that trying to change too many things at once can be overwhelming and be an obstacle to reaching goals. That is one reason I believe starting with small goals and gradually building up to larger goals is more beneficial.

It is important to know that creating new habits can take time and patience. The time it takes to build new habits can depend on the person, the habit, commitment to the habit, and other lifestyle factors. Many people believe it takes approximately one month to create a habit. Others believe it takes more or less time to reach their goals.

It has taken me various amounts of time and effort to create some of my current habits/routines, but I would like to share with you some helpful ways I have gradually created new routines/habits into my schedule. So far, it has helped improve the quality of my life and is helping me reach my goals at a more comfortable pace!

10 Ways to Build New Habits/Routines

1. Determine What You Truly Value and Intend to Create for Your Life

Knowing exactly what you want to achieve and prioritize can help give you a sense of where to start and simplify your goals. Writing down your intentions/goals can help you get more clear about your goals. It may include both long term and short term goals.

2. Start With Small Achievable Goals

This may include starting with one or two simple goals that are realistic and easy to achieve. These goals can be modified over time accordingly. The more the habits are practiced, the more likely it is to continue building upon the smaller goals. i.e. walking 10 minutes a day and gradually increasing the habit over time.

3. Combining a New Habit With Existing Habits

I find that tying new habits/routines to an existing routine is one of the best ways to not only get motivated, but can help with persistance. It is also a real time saver! For example, I started doing 10 jumping jacks after I brush my teeth each day. Over time I not only increased the amount of jumping jacks, but the amount I brush my teeth as well.

4. Using the Cue/Behavior/ Reward Technique

Everyone is different and may prefer different variations of this technique but the concept is the same. There are many sources online that further explain this concept. An example of this concept would be when I could barely get out of bed (let alone) take weekly classes, I chose to buy my favorite coffee drink (reward). The behavior or routine was getting out of bed and going to school. The cue was my alarm going off and the school day being on the schedule. Thankfully, I can attend class regularly without having to buy coffee every time but it did make a difference! Seeking out motivation and inspiration also helps facilitate the practice of a new habit. i.e. music, inspiring speeches etc...

5. Connections and Accountability

As I mentioned in my previous article, being accountable can help increase the chance of completing a task or goal. One way to be accountable is joining a community of people with similar objectives or goals. This can be helpful with motivation and create connections with others. i.e. Joining a fitness community online or in person.

6. Reminders

Having reminders such as visuals, auditory, written, or verbal reminders can be great ways to stay on track. i.e. leaving sticky notes around or using timers to complete tasks and stay on track.

7. Letting Go of Perfectionism

This includes not comparing yourself to others, letting go of "black and white" thinking, and expecting instant results. It's about knowing you may not do it all perfectly but you also don't give up on achieving your goals. I also find that having patience with yourself and the process and accepting that it is not going to be perfect can help with persistency.

8. Track your Progress and Celebrate the Milestones

Tracking your progress can help you see how far you've come to reach your goal. Rewarding yourself for your progress can help reinforce the new routine or habit you want to obtain. Some people use habit trackers or draw chains to keep track of progress. I also find that writing or talking about the progress can be another useful way to keep track of goals.

9.Environment

Similar to a growing plant, the right conditions to grow a new habit can impact the growth process of habit development. It's easier to focus on a goal or task in a comfortable environment. Also, being in a new environment provides new cues to start a new habit. It is about what works for you!

10. Replace a Negative Habit With a New Positive Habit

Much of our behavior is truly based on habits. This includes both positive and negative habits. I believe most people have at least one habit they know is not benefiting them and wish they could quit repeating it. Getting rid of negative habits can be difficult because the mind connects it with some kind of reward. The process of changing the behavior may also include setbacks, time, and may not occur in a linear fashion. There are also triggers or cues in the mind's connections that can trigger the behavior or habit. An example of replacing the negative habit is knowing your triggers or cues for the negative habit and replacing it with a new behavior. i.e. Drinking flavored sparkling water when having the urge to drink soda or alcohol. In this way, new connections can be made and the new habit can be developed over time.

Although most HSPs can be easily overwhelmed when faced with change , incorporating a degree of new healthy routines or replacing negative habits with positive ones can be beneficial. The tips in this article are ten of the ways I have worked toward developing new habits. Hopefully it will help someone achieve their goals and dreams! Feel free to let me know in the comments what works for you!

With Love,

Dahlia

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