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My stepfather thinks it’s okay to sexualize girls my sister’s age and I’m trying to prove a point because he doesn’t seem to think that’s wrong

decorating tip for people who aren’t allowed to choose their wall colors (teens, students, renters etc). they now make self-adhesive wallpaper that’s 

easy to apply by yourself 

removable: easy to peel off w/out damage

can be reusable 

they can be expensive, so shop around. a cheaper option is wall decals, which come in a range of sizes. you can even order a custom print online. or just use wallpaper on an accent wall or smaller spaces.

the patterns fun

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Sometimes, when we are presenting, our bodies act completely irrationally. Sweating, stuttering, or just shutting down completely are all things I have encountered during public speaking; behaviour that is usually connected to extreme danger and fleeing behaviour. Completely unnecessary, as your teacher won’t kill you (hopefully), but trying to convince your body to be just as rational is a tough task. Turns out that this is exactly what we’re going to do. 

The basis for this (personal) advice all lies in my musical training, where posture is extremely important. Performance practice lessons have taught me one important thing: you can trick your body into thinking it’s okay, and with that, your audience. disclaimer: I have posted this information before in a slightly different way. Regard this as an updated version. Hopefully one with better spelling.

hoooooow???

Stand up and try to follow these instructions. I’m your only audience right now, so mistakes aren’t a problem. 

Start by relaxing your shoulders. Many people tense their shoulders when they’re anxious, which is a very natural reaction. However, tension in your shoulder automatically reaches through to your back and arms, and even your neck, tensing up your entire upper body. It’s confirming to your brain that yes! this is scary! Well, brain is wrong and we’re going to prove it wrong by relaxing our shoulders. Just let them hang down (make sure you don’t start leaning forward though, it should be just your shoulders). Doesn’t that immediately feel more relaxed?

Keep your feet a little bit apart, firm on the ground. This sends the message to your brain and audience that a single push will not have you fall over. Standing with your legs closely together simply isn’t as stable, and you want to radiate stability and confidence. Even if you’re feeling dizzy, this simple way of pretending will keep your feet on the ground. Literally. 

Chin up, back straight, eyes at the audience. I used to tend to look at the ground, or to lean forward. No, no no! You want to maintain an open posture, and to address the entire audience. When you do this, you’ll look more secure, and maybe you’ll even notice people will listen to you more closely. Make sure you address the entire room, and not just one spot. if you’re scared to look at faces, look at the back wall. But not just one spot, find some nice different wall spots to look at. 

What to do with your hands? I know I used to put my hands in my pocket, or fidget with something. Instead, try to talk with your hands more. When you’re using gestures, people will usually pay more attention to what you’re saying, and there’s even research that suggests it enhances understanding.

Do not hide. This is special advice to musicians, too. I used to hide behind my music stand because it was nice and safe. During public speaking it’s easy to hide behind some notes or to stand behind other people of your group, maybe. Don’t. Remember, fake the confident posture till you make it. 

When you’re finished, don’t stop pretending just yet. When people ask how it went, always say it went okay. This is so so so important! Because if you’d say “ugh it was awful!! So many things went wrong, I suck at presenting!” they’ll start thinking hmm, yeah, there were indeed some mistakes… Could have been better. Whereas if you just say it was okay or good, or even decent, they’ll hardly even question it and will most likely remember the positive aspects, as humans tend to do. 

I promise this works, at least to some extent. It may not help you get rid of anxiety right away, especially in really severe cases, but it can help you feel more at ease in front of a group. After that, you can start working on other things, such as volume, intonation, powerpoint use etc. 

Just take a few seconds before you start talking to breathe, focus on those muscles, and to follow this with an amazing presentation (and a good grade). 

You can always send me an ask for advice on public speaking! Even though I’m not a professional coach or whatever, I have overcome my speaking anxiety and maybe I can be of any help at all

(‿ˠ‿)

Yasss

Pride Month might be over and it was great and all, but have you heard of the Pride Life? That’s how I roll.

tbh the real advice I’d give to anyone is, do shit alone. go to a museum & go at your own pace & leave the instant you’re done. go somewhere you’ve never been and just wander around, duck into & out of places as it pleases you. linger as long as you’d like.

What some person says: You need to do research for fantasy and think critically about how your world functions. How did they domesticate those creatures, and how are they feeding them? How are your cities fed, and what happens to their waste? How are all those soldiers trained and paid? Have you googled feudalism? 

What y’all think they mean: fill your book with unnecessary factual details about your fantasy world that no one cares about 

What they actually mean: You need to know the way your world functions for your own benefit, to be able to create a story that makes sense and holds up under scrutiny. If you don’t research, you’ll end up repeating dumb stereotypes about Medieval England that are more based on modern biases than real history and making grotesque factual errors that will make your story unreadable for anyone that paid more attention in class than you did. Not to mention that your pool of inspiration will be entirely based in other, already written fantasies, instead of the vast, colorful and woefully untapped well of actual human history. 

@writing-prompt-s where are you? All the prompts and stories I submitted are gone and I am incredibly upset